Akatsu-kits
by Wolfy-sama
Summary: When a dark teenage girl with an anime obsession is suddenly bombarded with a box of furry demons, she is forced, by her (annoying) excuse for a brother to keep them. On the path towards what she hoped was a peaceful life among the city, she was startled to find more than a few surprises along the way. Whether or not is was the cats' faults, was up for debate. I do not own Naruto.
1. Waking Up is a Pain

**Wolfy: So, this is the first piece of literature I dare publish... I would like to point out first and foremost, that I find no point in flames to this, as I am more so hoping for constructive criticism, as well as story ideas. It would be appreciative, as well as encouraged.**

 **Hidan: WOW. You used some fancy-fucking words, big fuckin' deal.**

 **Wolfy: *hits him over the head with baseball bat* FUCK YOU, YOU DAMNED SADIST**

 **Hidan: *twitching on the floor***

 **Kisame: Do you even know what half of those words mean, Wolfy-sama?**

 **Itachi: Kisame. Do not encourage her. She has a-**

 **Wolfy: 0/0 WEASLE! *drops bat* *glomps Itachi* chuchuchu *snuggles into cloak from shoulder***

 **Kisame: Pffh- HAH! What are you so worried about?! You got her wrapped ar-**

 **Wolfy: *eyes glint***

 **Itachi: Damn you Kisame!**

 **Wolfy: *pulls out chakra proof rope and spins around the two at hyper-speed***

 **Kisame: What the hell, woman?! Let us out of here! *struggles pathetically-* I do NOT do** **anything** **PATHETICALLY!**

* * *

"Another day in hell is about to start," Yuuki muttered sarcastically, slinging her backpack over her shoulder.

"Knock it off, Yuu-chan," the girl beside her whispered back with a scolding tinge in her voice. Her bangs clumped and swayed in front of her eyes as they moved across the drying grass in front of the semi-decent, four-story building that served as a high school in uptown L.A.

As the girls walked through the doors and down the hall together, footsteps in sync, several groups of students stopped to stare and snicker at the duo. Natasha could help but feel self-conscious, absently running a hand through her hair.

She glanced down at her attire with pity. Her clothes- which were semi-gothic- stuck out and away from her friend's name-brand jeans and throw over beside her. Natasha had a thing for black. Well...that, and anime. Well... one anime in particular. Naruto. Best. Anime. Ever.

Natasha sighed, then looked at her clothes again; black, baggy cargo pants, a dark red, loose t-shirt, with the Akatsuki cloud in white with black trim on the front, a Jashinist necklace, orange swirl drop earrings, and dark red converse. She also wore black, fingerless gloves with petal plates on the top of the hand with a slashed out Iwa symbol.

All-in-all, Natasha looked like an Akatsuki fan girl, which she was, but she'd skin anyone who dared to call her one. For one, the word "Kya~" annoyed her to no end.

Natasha blew out a puff of breath as they passed another classroom with reflective windows, and she finally pinpointed everyone's unneeded, and unwanted, attention. Even after three years at this school, whitish silver hair was uncommon, and frowned upon in society. After her first day she was accused of dyeing it. It took three weeks after to convince everyone that it was a very uncommon natural color.

She unconsciously ran a hand over the back of her neck and fingered the dog-tag metal on her lacy black choker, a slashed out Rain symbol in an Akatsuki cloud shape piece. (As anyone reading this can see, Natasha is a very devoted Akatsuki fan)

Natasha took a deep breath and opened her class-room door, pointedly ignoring the constant cat-calls and insults alike, as she walked briskly to her seat in the far back seat by the window. Giving her a clear view outside from their third-story perch.

"Hey Ugly!" one of the popular girls, Vanessa, called from her front-row seat, "You finally found some decent clothes," she paused as if realizing something dramatically, then continued, "Oh! Wait! Those came from the garbage!"

Natasha, still sighing, knew that it wasn't even half as indecent as her most recent insults. The only reason that any of the girls toned it down was because Joey Stickler was in the room.

Natasha pulled out the required textbook for that class, preparing to go over her set of finely detailed notes, just as a crumpled up ball of paper landed on her desk with a scuff. Natasha glared at it lightly, calming her hot-headed temper, and silently prayed to Jashin that it wasn't Joey. Jashin didn't hear her, she supposed... Maybe Kami-sama might give a damn next time...

 _Hey cutie,_

 _My offer still stands._

 _So when should I pick you up?_

 _JS_

Joey, the biggest flirt in the entire school, most famous jock in all of the school's history, and the most pompous person on the planet (in Nata's opinion) had asked her out 37- now 38- times, just from the start of senior year. Ugh. Natasha knew it was a death wish to even be within speaking distance of Joey, the threat being the Joey Fan club. First of all, he was a playboy. Second off, every single girl in the high school, and some from the grade school- save her close friends- were infatuated with him.

Natasha gagged mentally, and silently wondered what was found appealing of him. She scrunched up her nose in distaste as she pictured an image of her on a date with any of the jackasses called boys in the hell they called school.

No, she supposed slowly, she didn't need to insult the underworld like that... OR jackasses, for that matter... It was an uncalled for insult towards Hades and the jackasses she knew... However, that didn't keep her from tearing the note into minuscule shreds, before tossing them to the ground, not really caring about what it looked like to other people.

Kami-sama... Jashin-sama... Pein-dono... Please let this day end soon...

* * *

 **Wolfy: *slumps at desk in depression* What if they don't like it?**

 **Deidara: Aww~ *pats Wolfy's back gently* It's okay, hmm. I'm sure they'll review it for you...**

 **Wolfy: *peaks up with puppy-dog eyes* You really think so, Dei-Dei?**

 **Deidara: *smiles* Hai! If they don't- *glares darkly at the hidden camera* They will be introduced to true art...**

 **Wolfy: *GASP* WHERE IS SASORI?! KONAN?! ... AHH! I LEFT THEM AT THE MALL!**

 **Deidara: ...**

 **Wolfy: Fuuuuu- AHH! Deidara! You're in charge! *rushing around to find car keys that always seem to get up to walk away on their own* Don't blow anything up! And keep Tobi OUT of the sugar cabinet!**

 **Kisame &Itachi: *still tied up in naughty-corner* WHAT ABOUT US?!**

 **Deidara: ((^-\/)) *whistles while walking away spinning kunai around his fingers***


	2. Ramen is Life

**Wolfy: *swishes cape dramatically, stepping forward out of curtain* Low and behold! It is I! Wolfy-sama! Here to demonstrate a wonderful show of amusement for my loyal viewers!**

 **Hidan:(From behind curtain) Che! Like she has any...**

 **Wolfy:TTnTT Hidan?!~ Why you gotta ruin my fun, huh?!**

 **Konan: *Smacks Hidan from behind curtain* Baka! You know she'll just torture you for this in the story!**

 **Hidan:(Still hidden but jolsts curtain, ticking off Wolfy) *Laughs* You think I give a shit about what the bitch thinks?! Jashin-sama can smite her and still be too merciful-**

 **Alice: (Breaks wooden bat over Hidan's neck) ...**

 **Akatsuki: 0.0**

 **Wolfy: ...Thanks Ali-chan...**

 **Alice: No problem, leader-dono... *glares at the criminals* ... WHAT?!**

 **Akatsuki (All except Kakuzu): ..Did you... HAVE to knock him out..?**

 **Alice: Yes**

 **Everyone else: ...?**

 **Alice: WE WERE GETTING OFF SCHEDULE! NOW MOVE YOUR ASSES AND DO THE F****** DISCLAIMER ALREADY!**

 **Akatsuki (Shivering): ...**

 **Itachi: *sighs. looks at loyal readers* Wolfy-ch-..-sama.. does not own Naruto, the Narutoverse, or any characters other than her OC's, and herself... Any likeness of her OC's to real people is purely coincidental.**

 **Wolfy:...Did you.. almost use the 'chan' suffix..?**

 **Itachi: No-**

 **Alice: FOR PEIN'S SAKE! GET BACK ON SCHEDULE!**

 **Wolfy: ^-^ On with the show!~**

"What..Did.. You.. DO?!" the teen's voice steadily progressed in volume until she was a pillar of flaming rage. Her younger sibling of twelve was currently on her bed, sucking on a pocky stick and basking in the arfterglow that was destroying the middle-child's bedroom.

Sketchbooks were tossed around, torn in some places, with papers scattered everywhere, either from her desk, her bookshelf, or having been ripped out of places for snooping purposes. Not like she could understand anything even if she DID get her grubby little hands on the _important_ stuff, all her personal documents were either coded or written in Japanese, not like the little demon could read it, being born and raised in the US. The silverette, however, was fluent in Japanese, English, French, German, and Portuguese. The last one wasn't as important to her as the other four, but it worked well enough for their annual beach vacations to the private homes in Portugal, _and_ the occasional conversation she had to have on the phone when she wasn't able to leave the room and several pairs of snoopy ears were listening.

"I still can't get over how it's humanly possible to turn such a shade of red," the young girl, Shizuka, pondered aloud, taking an extra long lick on the pocky to aggravate the teen further, acting as if she wasn't even there, "Sometimes I wonder if we should check you into a mental hospital... The things you chatter into your phone, and that constant _twitch.._ " she smirked at the end, dragging the word out a second longer than necessary, if only to prove her point, when the silver-haired girl, true to her word, began to have spasmodic shivers run across her face and down her arms.

"You have _five seconds_ to leave...

Shizuka scoffed, letting her tongue swirl around the tiny treat in line of vision to her sister, taunting, "Like you would do anything to _Mommy's precious little girl~_ "

" ** _Mommy's precious little girl is about to be one less limb and half less hair..."_**

Realizing that the teen wasn't kidding for once, the smaller, long, wavy, black-haired girl with an identical face and deep blue eyes, bolted off of the bed, practically flashing out of the room through the un-blocked doorway, only to have the painted-black object slammed quickly behind her.

Natasha locked the door swiftly, before letting out a low, tense breath. She turned her back to it, only to lean against it, sliding down it painfully slow as she took in the disaster that had once been a safe haven... She _really_ needed to change her locks again... Maybe something digital this time, and **hack-proof**... Her closet doors were slid open as wide as possible, clothes spewing out as if barfed across the room. Half of her thick, hanging red drapes were on the floor, the other half billowing limply from their tie to the upper - _ **dented**_ **-** guide-rail. Her eyes refused to pinch shut for the rest of the horror, her mind demanding the closure.

Beanbag chairs were ripped apart, white, minuscule dots littering and floating around the room in the low breeze, caused by the partially open window. Her Television, miraculously, was untouched, though her gaming systems were unplugged, rearranged, and had all cords devoted to what could have been the world's biggest cord-ball... The mere thought of untangling them was enough to make her wince...

She didn't even have to analyze her bathroom, to know that everything was soaking wet and out of whack.

 _Kami-sama, kill me now..._

In a matter of two hours ( **that could have been spent watching anime-mind you!** ), the teen slammed the vanity door shut with a cry of joy, sinking the the plush black silk of the bench in fatigue. The polished mirror reflected her perfectly, down to every stress-induced crease in her eyes, and every bluish-purple bag beneath her eye lids. Her shoulders were hunched, and though she managed to clean everything back up, she was too lazy to go downstairs for dinner. Not like anyone would miss her, or anything... _Noooooo_... She goes to dinner, and Shizuka doesn't show up, or -heaven forbid- _Chojo_ misses even _one second_ of the dull, pointless chatter, _a search party is called for investigation!_ Nuh-uh, NOPE! Not for the second youngest! Not for the _only_ child who has a job! And a _career_ chosen! And a PLAN to get _out_ of the house! NOPE! She'll just let the two older boys, one older girl, and youngest girl have all of the attention...

She was never really bothered by the silence, anyway...

"I really need a life.." she muttered softly, before sighing, standing to shuffle to the kitchen. Maybe luck could be on her side, and dinner be over.. Then she could sneak some ramen out of the cupboard for herself... It's not like the house staff even knew she EXISTED anymore, either... They just stayed away from her end of the wing all together... Shizuka had make it pointedly clear to them on their first days that if hey were to ever speak to me, she would throw the hugest tantrum to "Mommy" and "Daddy" to get rid of them faster than you could say 'Whoops'...

There was really only one person in the house that didn't acknowledge her existence in a negative manner anymore.

Ryuu...

True to his name, he had the temper of a dragon. He was originally a brunette, but after a weird slumber-party they had thrown for his seventeenth birthday that had consisted of him, herself, and a crate of imported sake, they had the most brain-dead idea to color it a neon green. After the initial first week of it in, he decided that the color suited him, much to "Father's" protests, (which could also be one of the pros to it), that also seemed to compliment his deep golden eyes. The only reason the two looked even remotely related was the eyes. Most All members of the Wolfe family had them, unless you were one of the "blessed" children with blue eyes and black hair. Sometimes, she thought of the Uchiha clan for this, how the infants, like Itachi, were branded prodogies before they could even take their first breaths, or Sasuke, who had to bust ass to even get _achknoewledgement_ from his father. His mother cared, and his older brother _sure as fucking hades_ loved that kid enough to do such unspeakable acts, even having the audacity to feel _guilty_ about it! Him! Guilty! When it was clear as-fucking-crystal that it was an ORDER!

Needless to say, if she ever met him face-to-face, she vowed to knock him on his ass, sap him, then cry.

End of story...

Okay, maybe not.. _That_ would have been boring, now wouldn't of it? Hah! See? I've got you listening. So lets get back to Nata, and her agonizing _two minutes_ of waiting for ramen...

Taking her steaming bowl from the microwave with a huff, the teen shut the sleek black door, gliding out of the clean kitchen and into the hall, set on eating in her small nook, that had been tucked into the wall of her bedroom. Head held high, and mask in place, she swept up the stairs, gaze level with each swift step she took. After a minute or so, she neared her room, almost home free. But what kind of author would I be if I let her go unscathed, hmm?~ (Dei: A nice one, hmm. Wolfy: Oh, hush, you! I'm trying to be funny! Nata: *angry* At my expense?! Wolfy: 0.o W-What the- How'd you get here?! Nata: Hmm?-...Uhh... How... DID I get here..? Dei:...*facepalm**twitch* Wolfy:*snickers at his twitch* He just licked himself.. Eh heh... Nata:*giggles with Wolfy* Wolfy: *clears throat* Ahh- Back to the program!)

"Natasha Rose Wolfe! How dare you walk right past your _mother_ as if she doesn't _exist_!"

The enraged shout caused the teen to tense, back shooting pin straight, while her mask froze, and she barely turned her head, only to bow it in respect to the black haired woman before her. Blue eyes ablaze in anger, the thirty-something-woman-who-looked-like-her-twenties was glaring death at the odd-looking _thing_ she had, or more so, refused to _believe_ , she had, created, with the gorgeous man that was her husband..

"Well?!" she snapped, marching over to stand in front o the silent girl threateningly, "Do you have anything to say for yourself?!" Natasha blinked slowly at her, before lowering her head, her voice a somber mumble towards placating the woman. "Gomen, Kathrine-sama... My thoughts have been straying..."

The woman grimaced, grumbling under her breath about "stupid tramps" and "better siblings", before her gaze settled on her hands, a new flare of anger sparking in her eyes. "And what-" a French-manicured hand pointed slowly, but threateningly, at the bowl in her " _daughter's_ " hands. , "-is _that_ sorry excuse for a meal doing _upstairs_?!"

Her eye threatened to twitch, but she supressed it, and the een lowered her head further, internally flipping off the kami for being such asses, and gave the older woman a calm smile, "I missed dinner. I am studying for an exam, and have little time to waste. I apologize for disrupting you, Mi'Lady." There was no attitude in her tone, no sour expression, nio disrespect, so, tell her, why did she deserve this?

A sharp, stinging pain was across her cheek, and with a quick intake of breath, she bit back insults, keeping her eyes low as the woman lowered her hand, before spinning on her heal, strutting away with a furver. She stayed in the hall for several more moments, before she released her sigh, and finished the trek to her room.

* * *

 **Deidara: You wrote such a depressing chapter, Wolfy-chan, hmm..**

 **Wolfy: *frowns* I have to set the story, Dei. I can't just throw you guys in there with no background! IT's too cliche! Plus...**

 **Sasori: 'Plus' what? I'm growing impatient.**

 **Wolfy: *Blushes* I need some more ideas... ... ..HOW DID YOU TWO GET IN MY ROOM?!**

 **Both: . ." Uhh...**

 **Wolfy: -Hey! GIve me back my lapto-**

 **Deidara: R &R Please, Hmm! (^-\/)**


	3. Healing Hands

**Wolfy: Ohiyo Reader-chan's and Reader-sans!**

 **Hidan: You act like people give a f*** about your story.**

 **Wolfy: TT~TT**

 **Hidan: H-HEY?! WHY THE HELL ARE YOU CRYING?!**

 ***Door slams open, showing a VERY angry Tobi***

 **Tobi: HIDAN-SEMPAI! WHY DID YOU HURT WOLFY-SAMA?!**

 **Akatsuki: WHAT?!**

 **Hidan: *scared* I-I didn't do s***! She just got all teary-eyed at me for-**

 **Yuuki: *Socks him* Don't hurt my Nee-san!**

 **Akatsuki: 0.o... Don't you, you know, love him..?**

 **Yuuki: NOT IF HE MAKES MY BIG BRO CRY, IDIOTS!**

 **Wolfy: *hidden smirk* 'Tachi-chan!~ Will you please do the disclaimer?**

 **Itachi: Wolfy-sama does not own Naruto, or the Akatsuki. She does, however, own her OC's and the large hidden ramen supply under her-**

 **Wolfy: TRAITOR! DON'T TELL THEM THAT! *tackles Itachi to re-tie him up* ONWARD TO THE STORY, ALREADY!**

* * *

With a barely audible sob, Natasha Wolfe let limp noodles hang from her mouth, as she stared at her television screen. Sasori was physically crumbling at the feet of Sakura, swords holding him in place, and his grandmother slowly dying not twenty feet away... Ouch...

She bit down swiftly, the food not already in her mouth falling back into her bowl with a plop, her loud swallow muffled by a sharp gasp. She had no time to cry, as a loud, reverberating knocking assaulted her door. She practically crushed the pause button on the control of her Xbox, wrapping her blanket around her shoulders as she jumped to get the door. Pushing out the wood, she peered out slowly, only to step back, muffling a scream at the sight of a small, furry red fluff ball, with wide eyes, get tossed into her chest. She stumbled onto her butt in surprise, too shocked by the sudden catch to realize it should have been trying to scratch her. She looked back up to see her brother, who was juggling an old-looking box in one arm, and a torn, green backpack in the other.

"Ryuu!" the teen roared, unable to pounce on him in anger as she struggled to stand without the use of her arms, "You nearly gave me a heart attack! Stop trying to be a frickin' Kira wannabe-!" The neon-green haired teen merely gave her a bored look, before waltzing in, making himself at home. He ignored her miffed, appalled face, setting the box onto her bed, but opting to drop the bag to the floor. His attention was abruptly on the box as he began to open it, cold, pure concentration on his face as he unloaded it's contents onto the awesomeness that was her Inuyasha gang plus Sesshomaru, Rin, Jaken and Koaga bedspread.

"Nata- Little help?!" Was the only response he granted her, almost trampled over when his youngest blood sibling bolted over, knocking him away from the box and onto the floor. He barely managed to look up long enough to see his sister studying the bunch of kittens he had managed to smuggle through the house, undetected. Her attention was purely on the dark purple one, who seemed to be softly whimpering in pain, her ear twitching every now and then. Softly pulling her to her lap, the teen did a quick assessment, sending her sibling a glare rivaling that of a pissed-off Uchiha's.

"Where did you find them?" She asked slowly, rage boiling beneath the calm mask of serenity as she stared at her brother. Ryun sat silent for a moment, frozen in brief terror at the thought of getting attacked again, until he shook his head, clearing his thoughts enough to shake his hands in surrender, as well as his head in denial, speaking as swiftly as possible without stumbling over his words.

"No, no, no, no, no! I didn't do it!" The green-haired teen rushed, slightly quivering as he met her eyes, "It was Xavier! He and his gang were talking about blowing them up behind the tattoo shop! I couldn't just leave them there!"

"I didn't say that, baka. I asked 'Where did you find them'." She spoke lowly, a glance not wasted to put the boy at ease, "They're filthy." "Aah-.." he murmured, scratching his cheeek ith the edge of his painted black nails, some of it already chipping from the previous job done a week or so ago, "..Behind... That place..?" Natasha took a slow, calming sigh of disappointment, before shooting him a weak smile, Baka, you know the Wicked witch is allergic to cats for one... And that there's a vet in town, for two..."

"But-" he jumped up, rushing to her side as she examined them, his hands on her cheeks as he positioned her head to look straight at them, "-look at them!~ Don't they look familiar?~"

Natasha snapped her jaws at his hands, the older teen immediately releasing her out of fear, then a sheepish chuckle, "I know they smell bad," he swooped his arm in a hearty fashion for emphasis, "But it's nothing a bath and some tuna can't fix!"

"Remind me to send ou to Sam's for my next Ramen fetish," the teen glared, then turned to the box, lifting it as a whole and carrying it to her bathroom, "Go get supplies!" She shouted back, the older teen grinning in anticipation, then pouting, as she continued, "And I swear to Jashin-sama! Kami-sama! And Pein-dono! If you so much as buy a _single_ sweater for them, I'm kicking your ass!"

* * *

Natasha combed her hands through the dark purple kitten's fur. During the bath, it had become clear that she was the only female, and the most severely injured. A gash had been cut into her right side, and her front left ankle was sprained, as well as her back. The other nine had been cleaned, blow-dried, and brushed, set out to rest with their own injuries on a multitude of pillows scattered across her winding white leather couch. Most of them had minor sprains in their paws, about one or two on average, but no more had cuts, the teen decided sadly that the female had gotten the brunt end of the stick, and had been given the privilege -or punishment- of constant supervision and lap-cat care.

Ryuu returned twenty minutes later, arms laden with large paper sacks, mumbling about how awful the world seemed to be when you had to wait for half an hour just to by a leash. Natasha's glare shut him up, though, and he sighed, setting the bags onto the black marble counter of the nook, and smiled, trying to defuse the bomb he had set..

"I got some cat food, food and water bowls, wind up mouses, feather toys, leashes, a box of treats, and a set of do it yourself collars."

"Sweaters?" She asked suspiciously, and immediate pout and nervous sweat not lost as she continued the interrogation. He broke, after several moments, and revealed a tiny, lavender colored scrap of fabric, with a pretty white rose sewn into the hem, "I bot it for the injured one..."

Natasha battled the urge to punch him, before sighing, turning her eyes back to the blank, dark screen on her TV, "I was watching anime when you burst in..." He was busy setting out bowls and tuna flavored kibble, but sent her an obligatory hum, "Gomen, Outou, I did not mean to interrupt your worship." Natasha scoffed, stroking the kittens fur once more, glancing at the range of felines. "This is a lot of cats for just two people... One if we don't count you-" she smirked at his surprised look, "-which I don't- because you're too busy with your football practice and computer club. I refuse to take that away from you.. Besides," her voice turned matter-of-fact as she tilted her head to the screen, "I have nothing better to do... and maybe I can teach them a couple tricks... They are still pretty young... I shouldn't be too hard..."

Ryuu smiled, though she couldn't see it, and set down the finished meals, his quick announcement of dinner all the kittens needed to slowly rouse, then inspect the bowls, meowing to one another briefly, then reluctantly starting to eat.

Natasha ignored the others as she took the outstretched food dropper from her brother, thanking him passively as she held it to the weak kits lips, "C'mon... you gotta eat.." The kitten mewled, but made no move to suck at the offering. "Please..." she became softer, moving to set her onto a pillow, getting onto the floor to face her at eye-level, the dropper still in hand, "You gotta stay awake, little one... You need to eat..."

Ryuu watched in fascination as the kitten's eyes seemed to squint, struggling to focus on the golden eyed female before her. The kitten's head shifted, as if in thought, before cautiously shifting it's gaze to the others. It seemed to study them for a moment, and turned back to the teenage girl. Natasha offered it to her lips again, a soft, caring glow about her as she waited, her voice warm and pleading. "C'mon... You can do it... You're a fighter- I should know... C'mon... Just a little bit of this, and you can sleep tonight... Just eat a little bit..." Ever do slowly, the kitten licked the offering, and the teen's abrupt smile, left Ryuu speechless... Never once had she acted so soft like this in his presence. She was often cool, calculative, and witty, with just the slightest bits and pieces of sarcasm and dark humor to be entertaining. She wasn't usually a mother- okay- so she _did_ have two kids she looked after once in a while in town- but she was still detached. Maybe- he thought slowly, then backed up as she continued to feed the wounded kitten, Maybe it wasn't such a bad thing, to give her so much responsibility...

Natasha fished feeding the cat, giving her soft, murmured praises as she wiped away the hint of milk she couldn't lick away with the end of her sleeve, before standing up. She adjusted her blanket onto the kitten, before glancing at the others, going to her closet in search for impromptu blankets.

Ryuu stood back, hiding his smile behind his Otaku magazine, occasionally glancing up at the girl as she flitted about, finally settling down twenty minutes later after everything, including setting up the litter box and cleaning the dishes, had been done.

"You're surprisingly motherly," he couldn't help but blurt, her abrupt look back not angry, more so surprised. As if he had said he had just got back from meeting a hoard of Naruto cosplayers, and had failed to mention it until that point. She would't kill him, but she would be shocked.

"What gave you that idea?" she asked after a moment, settling into her only free seat, which was a white leather love seat with black leather stitching. She looked exhausted, but tried to hide it with calm, despite her knowledge of his emotional reading abilities.

"Well," he mumbled, putting a hand to his chin, as if the thought had just come to him, and he needed to think about how to expand it, "You're being very gentle... and you haven't complained once since I've been here... Usually you kick my ass out around eight or so..." "And..?" she asked sarcastically, "Are you going to go all Uchiha Itachi on my thinking that I'm too good for you..? If so, I _will_ kick your ass.."

Ryuu snickered softly, and shook his head, getting up, but not before tossing her the magazine with a grin, "I've got a date tomorrow morning... Unfortunately..." HE had stared casual, but the sentence winded down slowly until it was slight depression. "I don't why you can't dump the cunt," Natasha hissed, startling some of the cats at the abrupt fury of their new host, "One of these days, she will regret ever coming to be born..."

"Enough with the threats, Nata-chan..." Ryuu scolded quietly, before yawning, "She's the closest thing to female companionship un-related to me that I'll get..." "Why don't you just look for _her_ then!" Natasha yelled, throwing the magazine to the floor as she marched for her XBox, "I don't see what the hell that cunt has in common with Konan, but when you find out, by all means, _please indulge me_..."

* * *

It was well past two in the morning, and despite being a school night -or day- the teen was unable to sleep for even ten minutes without bolting awake, thinking that if she slept, on of the kittens might be hurt, or need something. Finally, around four thirty, she passed out, completely dead to the world as a black fluff ball with gleaming red eyes stared from the arm of the couch.

* * *

 **Wolfy: I hated that I needed to make them hurt to progress the story...**

 **Pein: Pain is the only true way to understand peace, I find no reason to disciplin you for it.**

 **Yuuki: Ooooh~! Does Nagato-kun have a _crush_ ~!**

 **Pein: *glaring* What did you call me..?**

 **Wolfy: Pein, if you lay a hand on her, eternal pain is the least of your worries...**

 **All: O.o**

 **Wolfy: What?! You know what-... Will SOMEONE please review this?! I'm starting to think no one likes it!**

 **Gwendoline: It's okay, Wolfy-sama! Gwen-chan likes it!**

 **Wolfy: *crying* Yeah! But you at least posted comments on my fridge!**

 **Kristina: *rolls her eyes* If you don't review, she's gonna mope in the emo corner...**


	4. Arguing Gets You Nowhere

**Wolfy: Well, chapter four is done...**

 **Konan: You don't seem very happy about it.**

 **Wolfy: No one's reviewing though! I know some really awesome people have favorited it, but no ones leaving feedback!**

 **Konan: Hmm.. Maybe you should give them modivation.**

 **Wolfy: How are Cyber-Cookies not motivation enough to say 'Good-Job'?**

 **Tobi: Tobi likes Wolfy-sama's story! ..Can Tobi have a cookie now..?**

 **Konan: Wolfy-sama does not own Naruto, or any other anime that may be mentioned. She does own her OCs, and a number of flattering drawings of the Akatsuki hidden in her-**

 **Wolfy: WHAT IS WITH YOU GUYS GIVING AWAY MY HIDING SPOTS?!**

* * *

Itachi stared at the raven haired female as she slept, Shiringan eyes blazing in the dark of the few paper lanterns strung from the ceiling, giving an ethereal glow to the decorative space around them. She was completely passed out, the numbers on the small black device on top of a nightstand beside the bed glowing 3:56. Absently, his tail flicked as he scanned the other members, most having curled up and passed out as well from lack of sleep, as well as the consumption of warm milk and food. (However inedible is was..)

Konan had easily been treated with the most care, though it didn't surprise him, the kunoichi had more than her fair share of wounds during the journey through the vortex. The only thing that the Uchiha really thought about now was returning, to even a child it was obvious that this world was not their own. If not for the strange clothes and advanced technology, a blind man(Not that he could vogue) could have smelt the pollution of the air, as well as heard the more boisterous vocabulary that such young people spoke or argued with.

Something stirred in the corner of his vision, and his gaze returned to the bed, the teen residing there twitching softly as she grumbled, mumbling soft, incoherent words under her breath as she tossed and turned, but remained unconscious. If nothing else, she had begin to prove interesting, though he was adamant on keeping the level of sociability at that.

* * *

Natasha's hand twitched irritably towards her left side, fingers clawing fiercely and the sleek white wood, realizing moments later that the item of purchase she had set to destroy was gone, but still near. Cracking open a single, golden eye, the teen glared at the head of neon green hair, a familiar face and form mockly tossing the alarm-clock from one hand to the other in wonder.

"It's a miracle Ole' Jenny has lasted so long," he breathed in awe, peering intently at several cracks in the _allegedly_ "LifeProof" Plastic, "You usually scrap the remains around the end of the week.."

"Get out before I castrate you and burn the remains," Natasha hissed, though there was no real conviction behind it as she slowly sat up, back popping in protest as she stretched, rumpled and groggy as she waited for the nuisance to state his business. "..What..?"

"I already fed the cats," he smirked at her alarmed face, chuckling, "Took them outside, too.. The witch left last night for a two week conference in Paris, so I saw no reason to hide them."

"I should go all 'Art is a Bang' on yo' ass!" Natasha snapped, throwing the pillow at his face, which he promptly caught, holding his chest, as if he had been shot, "You hurt me.. You really believe I would put innocent kittens' lives at _risk_?!"

"Wouldn't be the first time," the teen groaned, rubbing at her eyes, before struggling to stand, slouching over to her couch for god-knew-what as she began the morning process, "I thought you'd adhere to my promises, perhaps a good-ole fashioned castration in a sound-proof room is just what the physician ordered.." Ryuu rolled his eyes, scooping a cat up from the couch as he plopped down, it's squirming protest and startled mewls silenced as the raven haired teen's gaze snapped over to him, a look of fury on her face as she weakly pointed to the mess of pillows and blankets on her large white fur rug.

Ryuu's sheepish smile was all she needed to know before she stood back up, half-heartedly ruffling through her closet, then locking herself in the bathroom. She called through the door several seconds later, earning the attention of all of the cats as well as the neon-green haired male as he paled. "If I finish getting ready and you're still out there.. Jashin-sama will smile upon the lessons that beseech!"

Ryuu swallowed thickly, looking down to the silver kitten in his lap in defeat, "Don't ever do something to insult Jashin, kitty-kun.." he paused to pet the curious, purring feline as he continued, "She will put you through hell.. Believe me.. She makes quite good on delivering teachings.." At his horrified shudder, the kitten mewled, obviously enthralled, as the teen set him aside, and bustled for the door, "Call when you get downstairs!" he shouted.

"GET OUT OF MY ROOM YOU KAMI-DAMNED GRASS FAIRY!" Natasha roared, his answered choked scream muffled by his hands as he bolted.

Fourteen minutes later, showered, dressed, groomed, and polished, the teen exit the bathroom in cloud of steam, finally awake as she st herself among the grouped kittens that had taken over her precious couch. Slowly, she looked them over, before pointing at a subdued red one, who was being hassled to no end by a blond-ish yellow one. He seemed one of the most calm, so she made her decision, giving a mock-glare as she stood straight.

"You," she pointed at the red one authoritatively, attention completely on her as the group watched as gave a two fingered salute, "I leave you in charge.. Make sure they do not kill one another.." At their silent contemplation, she pointed to the brown tiger one and the silent black one, "You two are back-up.. Don't kill the others, just keep 'em in line."

With a nod more for herself than the cats, she slipped on her backpack, and scurried out the room, "Laters', kits, be back soon.."

* * *

Natasha trudged through the hallways of her home, Yuuki with her swaying black locks trotting dutifully behind. Sometimes, on days such as these, Natasha took a moment or two to ponder how the hell the taller girl had so much _fucking energy.._ "Yuu-chan... Please tell me you didn't drink monster during Study period, again.."

Green eyes widened, a slim hand shooting to her chest in pain, an exaggerated gasp leaving her as she withered against the wall, "Nata~! How could you say something like that~?!"

The teen didn't respond, not even sparing her a glance as she neared her door, using her palm to shield her fingers as she entered the code, breathing a sigh of relief as the door clicked open without problems, pushing the tall wood open a moment later, holding it just wide enough for the taller raven to slip through after the mad dash to catch up.

"So- back to our conversation," Yuuki grinned, tossing her bookbag to the bed, then pouncing to lie back on it, rolling onto her stomach as she peered at her best friend scurrying about the room swiftly, glancing from one place to the other, before sighing in relief, collapsing onto her couch with slight caution. "Eh-..? Nani..?" Yuuki peered closer at the teen, sitting up swiftly, and immediately seeing the small hoard of fur balls.

Natasha had two seconds to jump up, tackling the taller raven out of her glomping path, "Don't even think about it~! They're injured, for Jashin's sake!" Yuuki pouted, folding her arms over her chest, both ignoring the surprisingly suggestive position, per usual. "Can I at least see them, then?"

Natasha scowled in exhaustion, shrugging into a semi-sit, semi crouch with a sigh. "You won't listen, either way. What's the point of asking..?" "I'd feel better about half the shit I did if you gave me the god-damned okay once in a while," Yuuki snapped, flipping her hair over her shoulder as she stood, bouncing over with a sudden grin. Natasha grunted, straining to fully stand, and pick up the bundle of light blue cloth, containing the violet/blue kitten.

"Good morning, Sukoshi," Natasha sang softly, lightly scratching behind the kitten's ear, a soft smile touching her lips at the soft rumble of approval, "Or, afternoon, I suppose.. Did you sleep well?" The cat gave a low mewl, and she nodded, sitting back down beside the Tiger kitten and the Orange kitten carefully, looking to the red one suspiciously, "Are there any dead kittens I should take into account, Viper?"

"Who names their cat, Viper?" Yuuki cried indignantly, glaring at her from her perch cooing over the emotionless black kitten, "What's more, you dyed their fur! I thought you were against animal cruelty?!"

"Urusai!" Natasha snapped darkly, giving the red kitten a helpless look, "Viper doesn't sound bad.. I like it.."

"What's his name, then?" Yuuki demanded briskly, pointing to the blonde one her hands were slowly inching to pet. Natasha raised a brow, tilting her head towards it softly, a contemplative look on her face as she spoke, "I was thinking about names during free period.. I thought something like Hikaru for him.. He's the color of sunshine.. And his eyes, _however creepy,_ are the color of the sky in the summer.." Yuuki looked him over much like a scientist to a cancer slide, before nodding, grinning, and pointing to a kitten that was beginning to hop from pillow to pillow, as if the couch was lava, as it mewled in amusement. "What about that little ball of joy~? He looks so adorable~"

Natasha lifted a brow, a smirk touching her lips as she stroked the kitten in the folds of the blanket, "I'm stuck between Pixie Stick and Monster."

"He's _that_ hyper..?" Yuuki murmured incredulously, missing the looks on the kitten's faces, as if the teens had no idea how hard they hit the nail on the head. Natasha shrugged, murmuring softly to the kitten, before sending the teen a grin, "Pixie Stick... I don't want to go around calling for _Here little Monster! Here little guy!"_

Yuuki burst out laughing, pointing a perfectly manicured nail at her in amusement, "When are you ever one to coe like this?~ Maybe these little guys could make you a bit more-" "Don't even finish that sentence," Natasha barked, startling the kittens as they tensed, a look of irritation on their host's face as she glared at who they presumed to be a guest, "Just go back to what we were discussing! I don't need to hear about my many mental issues, thank-you-very-much!"

Yuuki sighed, eyeing the kittens briefly, and pointing to the biggest blue one, "What's his name?"

Natasha, thankful for the change of topic, gave a soft smile, "Majesty.."

Yuuki deadpanned, "Ah.. Isn't it a boy..?" Natasha twitched, glaring at her, and the kittens (at least the more emotionally open ones) seemed to mewl in jest. "Urusai.. It took a lot to find something to fit for him.."

"Why not call him Kisa-kun?" Yuuki snickered, "You _do_ have an unnatural crush on the hunky Akatsuki, don't you~?" At least eight pairs of eyes snapped to the duo with interest. "How much do you value your ability to request yoai on my computer..?" Natasha asked absently. Yuuki caught herself quickly, laughing with a bit of sweat, "Eh-heh~! Nata, you kid~!"

"I kid, not.." Natasha frowned, an irk-mark appearing on her brow, "I get enough crap about that when Ryuu-kun tries to hack my laptop.. I'm lucky father has no idea how to break a firewall or I can guarantee to you that all of your precious KakuHida would be gone.." Yuuki shivered at the imagined horror, but shook herself out of it, eager to get back to topic, pointing swiftly at the tiger-like kitten, "What's you decide for that one, ne?"

Natasha tilted her head to the cat, smiling slightly as er eyes closed, "I'm tied again.. Emerald, and Gerard.."

" _Gerard_?!" Yuuki scoffed, a look of disgust on her face, "The pshyco who lived under the theatre in a sewer and who kidnapped that chic and almost killed her fiancee-"

"Phantom of the Opera you ignorant Jashanist!~" Natasha whined, fake sniffling in pain, "How could you say such a thing about Eric like that?~"

"He's a creep.."

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"..."

It was silent as they met eyes, neither backing down, until Natasha smirked, leaning back with a single, deep chuckle, "You're such a brat.. You act as if you know anything about him.."

Yuuki jerked in pain, clutching her chest in sadness, "Why, danna, why?!"

Natasha giggled, winking as she turned back to the blank TV, "Oh, hush... It's not my fault you two were a match made in hell.. I'd personally enjoy his company more than what you'd want.."

"He has hand mouths," Yuuki choked, bring her own hands to her mouth as she gagged, "I don't want more than one tongue on my body in bed.." Natasha lifted a brow, grinning at her mischievously, "Oh~? I never said anything about bed.. Though.. Perhaps you'd prefer someone such as his master for a partner?"

Yuuki started to gag, but paused, looking thoughtful as she touched her lips, her sentence anything but innocent. "That depends.. Do you think he'd be into S&M?"

"He's a puppet," Natasha shut down her thoughts before they went into process, "Ten bucks says he didn't even change completely into wood.."

Yuuki chuckled, pointing to the silver white cat after several moments of silence, "What'd you think for him..?"

"I am completely positive about that one." Natasha spoke firmly, not an ounce of waver. Yuuki lifted both brows in expectation at her dramatic pause.

"..."

"Marshmallow."

"..."

Yuuki snorted, bursting out laughing a few moments later, tears streaming down her face while the cats stared in suspicion and wonder at the two teens. Natasha shook her head, looking to the orange, black, and bi-colored cats. "How about for those three.."

"Ichigo for the tabby.. Oreo for the bi-colored one.. And for the last.."Natasha smiled at the black cat softly, "Nee-san.."

Yuuki abruptly stopped laughing, looking at her with doubtful shock, "W-..Why?" Natasha shrugged, "He feels like a brother.. He gives off the same vibe that Weasel does.."

"Why not name him Weasel?" Yuuki protested sadly, "You're so mean to these cats.. Giving them such awful names.. Why not name one of them Paws?!" Natasha scoffed, rolling her eyes, as she pointed to the blank screen, "I'm in the mood for some SasuSaku romance."

"I don't get you," Yuuki growled, standing to get her laptop from her bag, the cats' eyes following her every move, "First you hate the kid.. Then you love him.. Then you hate him again, and now you're rooting for him to seduce Sakura!" "I like Orochimaru more than Sasuke," Natasha smiled evenly, giving her a conspiratorial wink, "Did you not find out why the scales where white?"

"I don't give a damn," Yuuki whined, crying, "He killed Hiruzen-kun!~" "He's a pedophile," Natasha snickered, laughing a bit louder at Yuuki's annoyed glare, "But you have to admit, Sasuke does become a real asshole!"

Yuuki frowned, sighing, "If only Weasel was spared that night.."

"Don't get me started," Natasha snapped, glaring at her angrily as her eyes began to sting, "Fucking Ma-dar-a.. Fucking Da-nzo.." Her voice cracked, distorting the names as she started to quiver. Yuuki, seeing her mistake, panicked, bolting over with her laptop, "Oh, no! Oh, no! I didn't mean it, Natasha-chan! I know it's touchy to talk about it, I'm sorry-"

Natasha crumbled, curling herself into a ball with the kitten still in her arms, detaching herself into an emotionless blob.

"He was so kind as a child.."

"Nata.."

"So much was on his back.."

"Natasha.."

"Why was he so firm with it.."

Natasha!"

"WHY DID HE OFFER, DAMN IT?! IT'S ALL THE FUCKING TRAITOR'S FAULT!-"

 _SMACK!_

Yuuki lowered her hand with a sigh, watching Natasha slowly return to quiet, sarcastic self, "Thank Pein-sama.."

"Fuck you, too."

Natasha glared, hiding her puffy eyes as she snuggled the soft bundle, "I hate discussing Uchiha matters.."

"Do you still want to watch Sasuke seduce Sakura?"

"Turn it on, damn it!" Natasha lit up, sitting up with renowned energy and excitement. Yuuki rolled her eyes, a smile on her lips as she connected her laptop to the TV, pulling up Youtube, then the Sasusaku playlist.

* * *

"I did not know there were so many ways to hurt someone with a butter sock.." Yuuki spoke in quiet awe. Both girls staring wide-eyed at the screen. They had browsed Youtube for an hour and a half, already breaking out the ramen at thirty two minutes.

"The world is filled with mysteries.." Natasha responded weakly, wiping her eyes to rid herself of the image, "Ano.." Taking a minute to look around, the cats were all attentively staring at the screen, though their ears twitched whenever the girls would speak, showing that though they were interested, they were still paying attention. "These cats are weird.."

"Weird in a good-way. A Bad way. Or the Funny-Ha-Ha, way?"

"Just.. Intelligent.." Natasha frowned, sighing, as she stood with her dishes, "It's getting late.."

Yuuki groaned, giving a ding whine at the end, before standing with a stretch, giving the occupied girl a sudden, sharp hug. "See you later, Red Dawn." "Sayonara, Leaf Girl.." Natasha murmured softly, smiling as they pulled away, Yuuki waving as she left.

* * *

Natasha lied silently in her bed, her palm holding her chin, as she studied the black cat sitting at the foot of her bed. Itachi had been given guard duty, as he was the most capable with moving around, as he had received much less severe injuries during travel.

"Can you understand me..?"

The cat peered over carefully at the abrupt question, the curiosity in her eyes piquing more interest than originally intended. Itachi didn't mewl, didn't purr, and didn't react, merely holding her gaze as they stared at one another. Natasha waited paintiently for several minutes, before she sighed, putting a pillow over her face in frustration, "Great.. I'm talking to my cats now.. Next thing you know, I'll be asking the microwave the best time to put ramen in.."

Hearing a soft, laughter-like purr, she peered beneath the pillow, seeing the black cat straighten himself out, then resume watching her.

"..You're a seriously creep cat, nee-san.."

* * *

 **Wolfy: I'd just like to give a shout-out to the awesome people who reviewed my story so far! Sasori-kun!**

 **Sasori: *rolls his eyes* On behalf of Akatsuki-no-Wolfy and the Akatsuki Organization, I, Akasuna-no-Sasori bestow upon the following loyal readers, a hug from Uchiha Itachi, and a bento of cookies from Tobi *mutters: Though I think they'd rather die..***

 ** _AndDatKat_**

 ** _jasper is hot1_**

 ** _kitty2142_**

 ** _Itachi: Do I have to-_**

 ** _Wolfy: *glares*_**

 ** _Itach: *hugs reviewers*_**

 ** _Tobi: Arigato for reviewing! *passes out cookies*_**

 ** _Wolfy: *bows* Arigato! Ja, ne~_**


	5. Morning Argument Equals Afternoon Nap

**Wolfy: Soooo... Fifth Chapter, huh..? *twirls marshmallow over campfire in the middle of the living-room carpet***

 **Konan: What are you doing.. With a fire in your home..?**

 **Wolfy: Oh! *Grins* This is nothing! Just a bit of flames that got thrown at me by a reviewer who wisely chose to remain anonymous.**

 **Ryuu: Do I need to beat someone up?**

 **Wolfy: NO! BAD RYUU! CRITICISM IS A BLESSING OF JASHIN! GO SIT IN THE NAUGHTY CORNER! *hits him with the burnt smore* TASTE FLAMES GRASS-FAIRY!**

 **Ryuu: But-?!**

 **Wolfy: *growls***

 **Ryuu: *gasps* Hey look! It's Itachi professing his love to Sakura! *points to the closet***

 **Wolfy: 0.0 *drops marshmallows* ITACHI?! HOW COULD YOU HAVE PROPOSED TO SAKURA WITHOUT ME DOCUMENTING?!**

 ***In the kitchen but heard everything***

 **Itachi: ...Who the heck is Sakura..?**

 **Kisame: Beats me..**

 **Tobi: Tobi thinks Wolfy-sama should stop watching that Me-Tube stuff...**

 **BTW**

 **I haven't really explained what kind of cats they are, so I'll be a bit blunt, now..**

 **Tea-Cup Cats.**

 **Google it.**

* * *

Natasha glared at the neon-green haired boy before her for quite possibly the eighth time that morning. He was obliviously curled up on her couch with a forgotten issue of a popular Sport magazine in hand, and a playful Pixie Stick chasing around the fuzzy tail of his wallet chain in a mad dash up and down the length of the cushions. The raven haired teen was brooding silently in her own corner of the couch, pouting slightly as she clicked around her usual writing sites, not really bothering to care as she scratched Viper behind his ear, the red tea-cup kitten purring softly as he watched on with intrigue.

"You can't be any cuter~!"

Natasha shut her laptop with a snap, the sudden sound gaining immediate attention from all of the room's occupants. "Must you invade my personal space every morning?"

Ryuu paused his game, shooting her a grimace as he scooped up the hyper kitten, cradling him in the crook of his neck as the tiny feline purred loudly. "I really thought these little guys would help you out." Natasha glared at him briefly, before tossing a glance to her cabinet, standing swiftly as she spoke, while her back as to him.

"They've lived in my room for a week, now. I don't seem to be a little chipper ball of crazy like your little friend there.." She called, going into the cabinet to grab a familiar blue box, "What kind of Poptarts do you want?"

"You berate me for being here.. Then ask what kind of Poptart I want to eat..?" he repeated slowly, sarcasm clear in his voice, but his look turning into an innocent smile at her sharp twitch, "Make it a S'More for me."

Natasha nearly chucked the package at his head, before grabbing several of her own, then bounding unceremoniously onto her deep fur rug, sprawled out on her stomach and eye-level with the yellow tabby. "Good morning, Hikaru.. Can I ask you something?"

The cat mewled in response, so she continued, "Do you think I'm insane? Ryuu certainly does. Don't you Ryuu?"

"Oh get off it!" he groaned, giving her a brief glare as he reached for the almost completely healed violet kitten, who was mewling softly with the orange teacup tabby, "It's okay, Sukoshi.. Nata-chan's just being a whiner.."

"Do I need to provide you with an example of what will happen if you continue to refer to me with such a horrific suffix?"

Ryuu scoffed, the sharp laugh accentuated by his flourished sweep of the room, "You-" he tore open the package swiftly, a bout of crumbs falling about his lap and, consequently, over Sukoshi, "-Are worse than the fucking Uchiha!"

...

Ryuu slowly lowered his hands as she froze, the pure silence and tense air of the room making a large uncomfortable slug lodge into his throat. After a few moments, she broke it, looking at his with calm curiosity, her fingers holding her acquired treat in her la, despite Hikaru's mischievous stare at the parcels, "..Which Uchiha are you referring too..?"

"The dumb-ass who refuses to forgive himself," Ryuu choked softly, before glaring at Gerard, or more, Eric, as he had taken to calling him, a startled whine disrupting the conversation as the raven haired teen mulled over the response. "Eric?! Why are you trying to get in my wallet?! Bad kitty`! No-! Hey! That's my IHOP card- Bad Eric-!"

"What a bunch of Akatsuki misfits," Natasha giggled, cutting him off as he played an unfair game of tug-o'-war with the tiger-like kitten, said kitten releasing the leather at her comment, but flying back into a cushion of the couch with the force, nearly taking down Ichigo and Nee-san with him. Majesty only stared at her, his tail briefly flicking with interest at the whole ordeal, despite his head being on her thigh, his body pressed flush against her leg on the rug beside her, he had somehow snuck up beside her, and was eyeing her food along with Hikaru, and Pixie-Stick, who had startlingly stated to beg like a dog on his hind quarters, even resorting to mewling constantly for the attention.

Natasha knew she'd probably regret giving them human food, though she figured the gut instinct was due to the fact that animals and people food did not mix well. However, being a sucker for the 'You-know-you-love-me' looks and rubs she was getting from the three, she groaned, tossing the slowly approaching red-kitten a half-assed glare, "Damn Akatsuki bastards... You pull faces on me.. That _hardly_ counts as good-form.."

Heaving a long, slow sigh, she sat up, pulling the four into her lap, "I'm going to regret this.."

Ryuu watched with wide eyes, not daring to speak as his sister feigned agony, opening her shiny metal package and letting the clean slice remain so. He held Sukoshi to his chest silently, absentmindedly tugging his own pouch out of the way of Marshmallow's claws as he pounced, ignorant to the kitten's dissatisfied hisses.

Deftly breaking off several generous chunks, she scratched the top of Hikaru's head, placing it between his teeth, before he hopped down, and sat, setting on the rug, and sniffing at it experimentally. She handed Majesty a bit more then him, seeing as he was almost double the size of the others, and turned to Viper, she had just let it clamp between his seemingly apathetic jaw, when a sudden weight knocked her back, and she was face-to chest with someone big, and pale.

Ryuu felt the poptarts slip from his hands, falling to the floor with a clatter, the last thing he remembered seeing being a naked blue behind as he face-planted into what could have been labeled the hardest part of the floor checked, so far..

* * *

 **Wolfy: *evil laughter***

 **Deidara: This chapter was deceptively short, hmm..**

 **Sasori: Brat, have you not learned..?**

 **Deidara: She said she wanted criticism, un. Write more! The updates are irregular, too, hmm!**

 **Wolfy: Excuse me for having writer's block and lack of internet access! *pouts at Sasori* Danna! Dei-Dei's being a jerk!**

 **Sasori: *inwardly groans* And what do you want me to do about it..?**

 **Wolfy: ...Got any rope..?**

 **Sasori: Aah..?**

 **Deidara: O-\/ Uhh.. Danna..?**

 **Sasori: I'm staying out of this..**

 **Wolfy: *Waves at loyal readers* Arigato! R &R Please! I really need it!**


	6. Kitten's First Day

**Tobi: Ohiyo everyone! Wolfy-sama is currently busy, so she gave Tobi the Intro job! Tobi promises to do his best, because Tobi is a good boy!**

 **Yuuki: *angry* You are _not_ a good boy. Good boys don't sneak into sugar cabinets hidden behind maximum security barriers in the middle of the night!**

 **Tobi: TT~TT Tobi wanted the cookies! Why is that bad?!**

 **Kisame: For the love of.. *groans* Wolfy-sama does not own Naruto, or any other anime, manga, music, or books mentioned. She does, however, own her respectable OCs.**

 **Gwen: He called us respectable..**

 **Kristina: Is he nuts?**

 **Alice: How should I know, I just keep us on schedule.. We still have a few more lines before they really have to start reading out of boredom, anyway...**

 **Ryuu: Who wouldn't be bored by your guys' lame-ass banter?**

 **Akiiki: For once, I agree with the grass-fairy...**

 **Ryuu: Oi-?! Only Natasha-chan and Wolfy-dono are allowed to call me that you Egyptian punk!**

 **Akiiki: Who you calling Egyptian punk you hentai-?!**

 **Echo: If you two don't shut the fuck up and let the readers continue with this I will beat the shit out of you-! *brings out giant leak* _Do not tempt me..._**

 **Tsuki: *sighs* Gomenasai.. *bows respectfully* Please ignore the lot of us for disrupting your reading..**

* * *

The sky was pitch black from what was visible from the mouth of the large cardboard box, ten, small balls of fluff huddled in the crispy cold air for warmth. Despite the clear view of the sky, the stars seemed to be hidden behind a sheen of light and clouds, the once familiar -if only familiar- escape of the animals that could mean some form of normalcy. However, normalcy did not include the soft mewls and hisses accompanying the slowly freezing kittens.

" **Where the hell are we?** " The loud, pained mewl would have gone unnoticed by any other creature within the alley, though the rest of the kittens in the box were well aware of what had been said, but unsure of how to answer, well, the more contemplative ones, at least..

" **Shut up, brat** ," a blood-red kitten hissed darkly, cradling his forefront paw to his face, despite the awful realization earlier that he had been given an actual, growing body, that was susceptible to pain and emotion (even if he suppressed the latter near constantly), he was annoyed and horrified to feel pain and discomfort over what he could basically describe as an ankle sprain, if ankles were supposed too be this flexible. The matter of them all becoming cats, however, was another mystery that the other felines could not solve at present. " **Obviously some kind of alley**.."

" **Can anyone shed any light on how his happened** ," a bright orange tuft of fur questioned authoritatively, despite sounding stressed and tired. His partner, the only female of the organization, was curled into his side, shivering uncontrollably as she nursed her wounds with her tongue, desperately trying to remain still enough not to inflict more damage upon the extensive injuries she had received. She had been the last one sucked into the swirling violet-black vortex, the painfully sharp edges tearing into her body with phantom blades and blows, leaving her aching and partially bloody from misplaced kunai and weapons tossed about the tunnel as they tumbled from one end to the other, unknowingly changing, and waking up where they were now, in a dingy old box in the middle of god-knew-where...

At the soft grumbles of displeasure, it was clear that no one had a clear understanding of how the current situation came to be.

Ears pricked up simultaneously at the sound of loud, boisterous laughter, shouting and the distinct sound of glass breaking not ten feet away after a door unceremoniously slammed open just outside their available field of vision.

"I'm _telling you_ , man! She was _this_ big! I swear-!"

"Shut it. That's a complete load of bull, Shimura. Even if it _was_ true-"

A bottle smashed just above the wall, startling some of the cats as their fur bristled, tensing in defense as a group of at last five boys, the clear leader in a large, puffy purple coat with a fur trim, the hood pulled back to reveal messy blonde locks and gleaming blue eyes, "-she'd have to be some high-classed whore for _you_ to get to touch her.." He threw the bottle at the wall above them, the pieces exploding and showering out around the alley, and sprinkling the felines with the tiny shards.

Kisame strained his neck as far out as he could, trying to get a better view of the group and the surroundings, despite his lame leg sending painful flashes from the tip of his tail to the fur of his ears. Suddenly, one of the more hyper-looking teens of the group kicked the box on his jog up to the front, the impact nearly sending him flying as he face planted into the grimy pavement.

The group burst out laughing, one of them being pitiful enough to haul him back up by the scruff of his navy blue jacket. "What the hell was that?

The box was suddenly the center of attention, though they seemed to get more feral looks out of the teens than anything else.

"Hey, check it out..."

"A bunch a' rats..."

"Should we hock em' off?"

"You dumbness! We need to feed them to boss's dogs!"

"You guys are mental! We should blow them up, idiots!"

The group continued to argue drunkenly over what to do, when a sharp, loud bang sounded out, most of the more sober one hitting the ground out of reflex. Several more warning shots, and the leader growled, barking at the drunks to 'Haul their lazy asses up and run!', taking off himself before most had even processed the order, before following suit.

It was dead silent when the teens disappeared, until a soft tread of footsteps came slowly closer to the box. A new teen, obviously sober, with bright green hair and sharp golden eyes, peered into the box suspiciously, a pained look crossing his face as he examined them. "Poor little guys.."

"Dragon?! What the hell's keeping you?!" A burly voice demanded not twenty yards away, "We have five till the fuzz show up!"

'Dragon' as the cats identified the teen, flinched, calling back in a slightly irritable tone that he found contraband, and was taking it to be inspected by his specialist.

The voice grumbled with obvious distaste, but dropped the subject, glaring at the teen as he gently scooped up the box, pleading to the kittens under his breath to be silent, before jogging towards his car.

* * *

'Dragon' had sat silently with the opened box in the tiny, shaking sitting room, that would periodically shake, jostle, and growl. When the noise finally ceased, he had taken the box with him as he exit, the scenery now completely new, with wide open spaces, and a large building looming past a delicate white fountain.

With a swift pace that clearly belonged to an experienced athlete, the kittens watched silently as he climbed the stairs, turning his steps to a steady, suspicious inching, as he tread the halls. " **Fi** **gure out where we are** ," Pein instructed quietly, noting the boy's tense form, " **Pile up if you must.** "

It had fallen to Sasori to stake out the surroundings, being the smallest, just a tad tinier than both Tobi and Konan. He had mounted atop the pile of Kisame, Hidan, and Kakuzu, just barely reaching his upper body above the lip of the box, when a sharp jerk of the oblivious teen, caused by his eagerness to pound shamelessly upon a large black door, sent him grasping for purchase. He was about the fall forward, but his reflexes kicking in caused him to shoot towards the door, claws extended in hopes of finding purchase. The door opened before he had gotten half-way, the figure he had accidentally sunk his claws into squeaking sharply in surprise, grasping at him as they fell back. It was apparent, before the new person had even pulled him away for examination, that the figure he had "attacked" was female, and surprisingly endowed.

"Ryuu!" the teen roared, unable to pounce on him in anger as she struggled to stand without the use of her arms, "You nearly gave me a heart attack! Stop trying to be a frickin' Kira wannabe-!" Sasori resisted the instinct to hiss at the teen for the volume, his eyes remaining half-lidded as she seemed to realize what had been thrown at her.

The two seemed to argue, back and forth, and Sasori held tightly as she bolted for the curtained bed, setting him gently on the surface of it as she examined the rest of the box. He almost smirked at how fast Dragon had tumbled off the bed. The blanket he was on had a large image of a boy with white hair, and weird animalistic ears, and a girl with a bow and arrow in a tiny green and white outfit. There were also a tiny child, a girl with a large boomerang, a man with a staff, a man with longer white hair and regal robes, another child with a lost tooth, and a man with tan skin and a tail that dressed in furs. Odd.

"-Remind me to send you to Sam's for my next ramen fetish," he turned back in to the female smiling sadly at the box, abruptly, she snapped her head back to the neon-green haired boy, a look of determination on her face, "Go get supplies!" He practically felt the menace roll off of her in waves as her tone turned hostile, a fist raising threateningly towards the other teen in warning as she spoke, "And I swear to Jashin-sama! Kami-sama! And Pein-dono! If you so much as buy a _single_ sweater for them, I'm kicking your ass!"

* * *

Deidara purred idly in thought as he was lifted from the box and set onto a cold tile floor. It was clearly a restroom, if the white walls, large bathtub, and other fissures didn't give it away. The teen that was taking care of them had turned the water on, and was currently taking inventory of the large mass of felines.

The blonde sized her up slowly, raising a kitten-eyebrow when he noticed the newly-resurrected Sasori gravitating toward the girl, completely unnoticeable for anyone who hadn't spent enough time with him before.

"You guys are just a bunch of misfits, aren't you..?" the girl murmured with compassion, taking her time to dab the wounds of he violet kitten then wrapping her wounds after a quick, soft washing. After placing her on the counter in a make-shift bed of fluffy towels to sleep, the raven sighed, rolling her sleeves up with a curious look to the fatigued felines, "Very _unlucky_ misfits.." she corrected herself softly, giving them a reassuring smile as she prepared herself physically and mentally for the inevitable scratching.

She couldn't really believe how tame the kittens were. Naturally, she had originally dialed it up to their injuries, wondering on the thought that they only respected her out of self preservative fear. Then came the more delusional, but slightly less believable, thought, that they seemed to be intelligent. Not to say they couldn't be little Einsteins one day.. She just had this feeling that they _knew_ she was trying her best to help them.

Natasha lightly rinsed the black kitten slowly, making sure to get every crevice, including behind his ears. She was mindful of his front left paw, as it a small injury. She had the sneaking suspicion that it was sprained, though she kept her thoughts to herself, humming softly as she went down the line of fuzzballs one at a time.

The only one that seemed to put up a fight had to be the silver one, but only, she supposed, was it because of the fact that that her nail had grazed his wound, and had sent him into a hissing fit of absolute rage. He refused to even near her to be dried off. Oh well, she supposed she could get back to him soon enough, the water wouldn't turn cold for a little while, so she supposed she had a little time..

* * *

"Alright, that's it _Marshmallow_! Fuck off! You're being a god-damned pussy- and not in the good way!" Natasha growled darkly, examining the barrage of thin red lines up her arms, "If I so much as have to _adjust my **posture** again_ , I will lock you in a Jashin-forbid- kennel!"

Hidan hissed softly at her, a curious look overtaking his features at the mention of his deity. _Is she a Jashinist..?_

Natasha heaved a sigh, letting the last dry kitten scamper slowly toward the rest. She had wrapped their wounds, and was deep in thought, her hands absently reaching out to hold the bi-colored one, stroking and scratching behind his ears, "..Shizuka might try to take you guys.. But I will be damned if I let her put bows in your fur.."

" **At least we know she's not into animal cruelty,** " Kisame spoke enthusiastically, trying to lighten the tense atmosphere. His meow seemed to snap her out of her daze, a sweet smile coming to her lips as she set Zetsu down, pulling the blue kitten to her chest tenderly. The others watched on in silence as she laughed quietly, burying her face into the shark-kitten's fur, before inhaling deeply, "..You are such a sweetheart.. I bet you're a little ladies man with Sukoshi, uh~?"

" **Sukoshi..?** " Kisame mewled, confused, as the teen cuddled him a tad more, unintentionally pressing him between her chest, eliciting a slightly amusing gasp from the child-like Akatsuki on the floor. " **Kisame-sempai?! Why are you touching Hime-chan's chest?! *GASP* Is Kisame-sempai a hentai like Deidara-sempai?!** "

Deidara waited two tense seconds before he pounced on the black nuisance, an unamused look coming from the raven-haired girl as she rolled her eyes, before snuggling into the blue-kitten's pelt, padding slowly out of the room causally towards her couch. She couldn't help but mentally observe how big he was compared to the others, and smiled gently at the thought. "Majesty.."

Kisame looked up at he soft murmur, his ears flattening in pleasure as her soft hands ran up and down his coat, teasing his underbelly, then bringing his face to hers. "I want to call you Majesty.. Blues and purples are Aristocratic colors.. Plus.. You literally need to crane your neck down to see the others.." She giggled quietly at the end, nuzzling his cheek affectionately, before turning him to face the blank TV. "Why doesn't Mama show you what her hobbies are..?"

As startled as Kisame was to see the black screen explode into an array of images, he toned it down to burying himself in the thick blanket, hiding behind a raised wave of fabric to observe the new technology in suspicion.

Natasha flicked on her Netflix, immediately going onto her personal account and flicking on Ouran High-school Host Club. It was a bit too.. peppy.. for her.. But she found solace in how much Haruhi and herself resembled one another in personality.

"This, baby," she cooed lovingly, snuggling the blue kitten into her stomach, much to its shock, "is called anime.. If you're going to be my little boy, you're going to learn _all kinds_ of stuff about Japan.."

* * *

 **Wolfy: So, how was it..?**

 **Ryuu: *glares***

 **Wolfy: What?**

 **Ryuu: You put off updating this..**

 **Wolfy: *swallows* Oh yeah..?! You try writing when you get less than an hours sleep, have minimal computer access, and get complete writers block!**

 **Kisame: *staring at TV screen* Why would they name something violent after a cleaning product..?**

 **Wolfy: Bleach..? *plops onto sofa beside him* Ehh.. Who knows..? Can you pass the popcorn..?**

 **Ryuu: Are you even listening to me?!**

 **Kisame: Ne..? Doesn't that Byukuya remind you of Itachi..?**

 **Wolfy: ..Oh.. ..My.. ..God.. *glomps him* YOU UNDERSTAND! X'D**


	7. No chapter name Derp

**Wolfy: Can someone please explain to me how this is even becoming noticed?!**

 **Kakuzu: Are you complaining about that..?**

 **Wolfy: *shocked* HELL NO! Im just shocked people favorite this thing!**

 **Ryuu: Why they even bother is a mystery. You put this off to start a new story. Where's your sense of determination?!**

 **Wolfy: TT~TT Buried alongside my broken heart...**

 **Konan: What happened to her?**

 **Kristina: She just watched the final episode of Amnesia.. It's been a really depressing cliff ending for us _all_..**

 **Wolfy: *wipes away tears* Gomenasai reader-chans.. *sniffs* I promise to work harder to update this fanfic for all who wish for it!**

 **Alice: -_-" Did you just pull a Might Guy moment?**

 **Wolfy: O-O .. _No!_..**

* * *

Pein watched in rapt awe, along with the rest of the felines, as the screen burst to life with color, and sound. It was a strange thing, seeing others' lives with just the click of a button, though it was a mystery he was determined to solve at a later date. For now, he would ponder how she knew so much of the organizations information, if the constant, gentle babble she adopted during the "baths" said anything for it.

He listened to her explain small mundane details of this "Japan" place, the clear adoration and respect in her voice not lost on the helpless demigod. Surprisingly, the place she described was not unlike their own lands, despite the clear distance her own culture would compare to it. The room was extravagant, to say the least. A daimyo couldn't afford such luxuries that she seemed to be accustomed to.

He was particularly suspicious about this new character. However grateful he was for her care over them, the fact that she could pose a threat did not go unnoticed. Madara, he could tell, was planning something, as he always became much more "Tobi-like" as he schemed. Part of that, he assumed, was the urge to act accordingly, while one's thoughts stray... He often caught Hidan in the middle of insane laughter as he stalked around the base.. Usually after Deidara had played a prank, and he was planning his revenge.. Jashinism was a particularly helpful form of text for that exact forte-

He was getting off track..

Damn low feline attention spans..

Pein's ear twitched softly when the girl began to snort, her hands desperately trying to muffle her laughs as the screen displayed the strange images. He could make out some sort of tropic area, but there were a number of shinobi-aged boys, all in civilian-like clothing, in what appeared to be a manufactured spring. They were speaking gibberish, but dialogue flashed at the lower part of the screen in what they assumed was a translation. The comedy seemed too much for her to handle, as she fell forward, loud, unrestrained laughter wracking her form as she clutched her sides in pain. He half expected her to start beating the floor with her fists, though she appeared more sophisticated..

Natasha slowly calmed down, giggling softly only when the curious kittens had gathered around to see what the fuss was about. She smirked slightly, letting a soft sigh breeze past her lips as she glanced around the mass of fluffs. Deidara tilted his head at her focused look, " **What's wrong with her**?" Her eyes found his curiously, the golden hues fading slightly, before softening, reaching down and cuddling the blue kitten -the uninjured one- into her neck. She started to hum, a light, lulling melody, as her hand clicked the screen to freeze. Kisame listened intently as started to sing, a dark, but soothing sound, to his sensitive ears.

" _Come little children.. I'll take thee away.. Into a land, of en-chant-ment.._ "

All of the nin brought their eyes to their host with a start, the haunting hum to her voice giving the smoothest purr to the feline in her hands. " _Come little children, the time's come, to play, here in my garden, of magic.."_ She started to hum, slowly standing with the kitten held tight. She padded slowly over to the pearly table, the mirror placed against the wall gleaming softly in the dim room lighting. " _Follow sweet children.. I'll show thee, the way.._ _"_

Her hands pet Kisame briefly, before flicking into a decorative wooden box, pulling out a shiny black comb. " _Through all the pain.. and.. the sooo-roooows.. weep not for children.. for life is this way.. murdering beauty.. and passions.."_ Kisame watched, frozen in surprise, when she slid the comb along her forehead, the shiny black teeth snagging at her black hairline, before sliding beneath it. Had he not seen the raven locks tumble onto the floor, he would have thought that she had stabbed herself..

" _Hush now dear children.. It must be this way.."_ Wisps of white bounced gently as the teen fluffed her hair, her eyes focused intently on her gentle brushing, " _To weary of life.. and decep-tions.."_ She placed the comb down carefully, reaching again into the box, this time for a long black piece of silk ribbon, " _Rest now my children.. For soon, we'll away.. Into the calm, and the quiet.. Come little children, Ill take thee away, into a land of enchantment. Come little children, the times come to play, here in my garden of shadows.."_ She tugged the ribbon Sakura-style through her hair, tying it into a tight bow at the top of her head, then adjusting it to hide at the nape of her neck.

Sighing, the teen titled her head at her reflection, frowning slightly, before shrugging out of the seat. She closed the lid to the box, Majesty hesitating, before following her hand, and brushing against it. She peered at him gently, a slow, soft smile touching her face as she picked him up, retrieving the wig from the floor, and placing it gently onto a hook behind the mirror.

She blew a silver lock out of her face, before bringing the blue kitten up, nuzzling her nose to his softly, "Gomenasai, Majesty.. I hope I didn't creep you out.. That was a lullaby that uncle Dragon sang to mommy when she was little.." By 'uncle dragon', he assumed that she meant the green haired boy she had called 'Ryuu' earlier. "Mommy doesn't like her hair very much.. Lots of people don't.." Her soft coo faded, a barely audible murmur passing her lips as she took him to the kitchenette table, ".. _Obaasan sure as hell doesn't like it.._ " "You won't meet Obaasan if I can help it.." She set him down gently as she stopped into the lower cabinets, "-but maybe.. if Ojiisan is in a good mood.. I'll let you meet him, someday.."

* * *

 **Wolfy: *dodging tomatoes* I know its late! *ducks chair* Fucking Pein! I'm sorry! My account wouldn't let me get on my profile! *dives to avoid mace***

 **Ryuu: *calmly sipping tea* Its your own fault.. You forgot to talk to your school technology teacher about the firewalls..**

 **Wolfy: *running from angry fangirls* DO SOMETHING!**

 **Ryuu: *siiiiiiiiiiiiggggggh* ..Baka..**

 **Wolfy: *crying* RYUU!- *hides behind Itachi* HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEE!**

 **Ryuu: O.O Look! Itachi Uchiha just announced his engagement to Hinata!**

 **Fangirls: *freeze in anger***

 **Wolfy: *still crying* I think you made it worse...**

 **Ryuu: Wait for it..**

 **Fangirls: *grabs pitchforks and torches* TO THE HYUUGA DISTRICT!**

 **Wolfy: It.. It worked..**

 **Itachi: -/_\\- At my expense..**

 **Ryuu: Pssh! *waves it off* As if they would do anything worse than rape you..**

 **Itachii: O.O**

 **Wolfy: *stuffs Itachi into her closet* NEVAH! Over my dead body!**


	8. Drugs for Christmas

**Wolfy: *howling* GOMENASAI~~~~~~~~~!  
**

 **Ryuu: *covering ears* SHUT UP YOU IDIOT! YOU'VE BEEN SCREAMING THAT FOR THE PAST TWELVE MINUTES!**

 **Itachi: *sitting next to Wolfy calmly* If I may, Ryuu-san..?**

 **Ryuu: *on his knees* PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF ORIGAMI! JUST SHUT HER UP!**

 **Itachi: *pokes her forehead***

 **Wolfy: *silent* 0\\\\\\\\\0**

 **Ryuu: *slowly moves hands* I-.. Is it over..?**

 **Wolfy: *eyes glint***

 **Ryuu: Spoke too soon-**

 **Wolfy: *tackles Itachi* Ita-kun~! You have accepted me~!  
**

 **Itachi: *thinks it over* Ehh.. Why not..**

 **Ryuu: You should never ask that...**

* * *

Natasha blinked slowly at the creamy tan skin above her. She was vaguely aware of a shiny yellow curtain sweeping around her and brushing the floor, but what caught her attention near immediately was the oceanic blue eyes gleaming down from above her in surprise and intrigue.

"What the fuck did Ryuu slip into my coffee, _this_ time?"

The intrigue was gone from the sharp blue eyes, replaced with surprise and fear. The male scrambled clumsily back, scraping his elbow on the tile floor, and skittering for something to cover his.. *cough* extremities...

Natasha slowly sat up, eyeing the long blonde haired boy, and looking curiously toward the much bigger, pale blue skinned man, both, she noted, were completely naked, and staring at her in blank wonder. A flash of red caught the corner of her eye, and she turned slowly to see the new red head, with almost alabaster skin. His eyes, she noted, first, were a deep, chocolaty maroon color. He was more subtle about grabbing a nearby blanket to wrap around his hips.

She blinked once, then looked back to the blonde. Then blinked again, before turning to the blue man, and turning back to the red head.

This continued for a long, silent minute, until she brought her hand up, waving it towards them slowly.

"Uhh.. Hi, hallucinations..?"

Kisame blinked in silence, turning to Sasori for guidance, as he was at a loss of what to say, or do, at this point. The red-head was scowling slightly toward the kittens, seemingly upset about the lack of communication, until a loud, growling hiss echoed around the room, and Marshmallow pounced into the silverette's lap, snatching the outstretched piece of poptart that had been aimed to be given to Pixie-Stick.

Startled at the attack, the silverette yelped, scrambling away from the snarling kitten and gluing herself to the large blue looking man with a face of fear, "I do not hallucinate pain! I'd prefer not to be scratched by a fuzz-ball!"

Kisame held completely still, not daring to move while the redhead and blonde stared on in surprise and irritation. Natasha stared at the kitten in suspicion, the expression slowly fading into awe as the kitten was suddenly gone, no puff of smoke, no grotesque growing, but in an instant, the kitten was gone, replaced with a large man, with stringy silver hair, and bright amethyst eyes. She sat in silence for a few minutes, each of the humans looking between one another for what to do next.

"Finally!-" Can you guess who that was..?

"-That cat body was fucking awful!" Ahh! Hidan..

Natasha blinked, slowly turning her head to look up at the chest, then neck, and finally face, of the shark-ninja, Hoshigaki Kisame. She blinked again, tilting her head just enough so he would look down, locking eyes with her.

"OH MY GOD!" she screamed, the sound startling the conscious males as she leaned back, before shooting forward, tackling the male she had straddled into the rug, "THIS IS THE BEST FUCKING DRUG RYUU'S SLIPPED ME _YET_! MOTHERFUCKER! HE BETTER HAVE MORE OF THIS SHIT!" She was squealing now, nuzzling her face into his chest like a stuffed animal, " _KISA-KISA-KISA-KISA-KISA_ **-EEEK** _Kisame-kun_ ~!"

"What the-..?" Deidara rasped, his shoulders slumping slightly as the silver male stood, frowning at the way they had covered themselves, and rolling his eyes, before swiping a blanket from the arm of the couch, wrapping it around his hips like a towel, "Fuck this shit, I'm starved.."

Sasori opened his mouth to take charge, but a sudden weight knocking into his chest sent him to his side, his reflexes kicking in and having him roll over, pinning the offender to the ground, only to stare, wide-eyed, at the quivering, golden-eyed girl beneath him. Her face was flushed, but the child-like awe on her face had yet to fade. She was still for a moment, his hands automatically retracting from her shoulders, his body tensing when she sat up abruptly, throwing her arms around his body in a severely tight hold. "Sasori-! You're not wood-!" She sat back, her words lowering as she spoke to her self, " _Thank god, I'd probably be under my bed with a Nerf gun if you were still a puppet.._ " she shivered in slight fear, before nuzzling her face into his collar bone, "You're so soft~! It's so adorable~! I'm asking Ryuu to get me more of this when I wake up.."

Sasori pressed his mouth into a firm line, his chocolate brown eyes trained sharply on Deidara, who was twitching in a mixture of disbelief and mirth at the slip of a girl _cuddling_ such a renowned, and feared, assassin. Said girl paused, as if shocked, and locked eyes with the blonde, a look of anger on her face, before she was attached to his arm, a struggle of emotions on her face as she muttered dark words of loathing and anger. " _I'm so mad at you, but you're too fucking awesome-.. Why did you have to sit on Gaara- For fucks sake you should have BEAT Duck-ass!_ "

She growled under her breath softly, before looking him up and down, and going blank. She snatched his hand off of his lap, the blonde too surprised to say anything -or DO anything- really, when she flipped his palm over, and stared pointedly at the slit that hid the teeth and tongue from view. It was silent for a moment, before she looked into his face with a derp face, "You don't have any clay on you, do you? I don't want to hallucinate my bedroom exploding.."

...

There was a long, tense silence, before it was broken, the girl having turned her attention back to the largest male, once again attaching herself to his torso.

"I don't give a damn if I overdose," she purred dreamily, sending him a wink, "If you're here, its completely worth it.."

He stared at her for a minute, looking stuck between pushing her off and/or asking her if she had any idea who she was straddling. _Less so if she knew if he was nude._

Natasha had only a few seconds of tame pleasure with her new waifu, the interrupter being her green-haired brother bolting out of his unconscious bout with a start, yelling something along the lines of "FISH ARE FRIENDS! NOT FOOD!"

* * *

 **Wolfy: *peaks out from pillow fort* ..Oh, I just realized how late this is...**

 **Ryuu: *still hiding in blanket nest* Baka..**

 **Wolfy: *tickmark* WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!**

 **Ryuu: *shiver* N-Nothing...**

 **Wolfy: *grumble* Thought so...**

 **Yuuki: *pokes out from underneath bed* Rate and Review please~!**

 **Ryuu: O_O H-.. How long has she been there..?**

 **Yuuki: ...Since yesterday..?**

 **Wolfy: Quick question for my reviewers! Who do you think should  
Natasha develop relationships with?!**

 **THERE'S A POLL!**

 **PLEASE NO SPAMMING**

 **Ryuu: Sayonara!**


	9. Pillows and Pocky

**Wolfy: The poll is up on my page, so I'll be awaiting your opinions~!**

 **Deidara: *raises brow* You really care?**

 **Wolfy: *angry* Of course I do! Why would I even ask about it if I-**

 **(other room)**

 _ **CRASH**_

 **(Wolfy's room)**

 **Ryuu: The fuck was that? O.e**

 **Wolfy: I don't even-... Is that a black eye?**

 **Ryuu: ...Shit...**

 **Wolfy: Ryuu, you have two sec-**

 **Ryuu: *bolts into hallway* I'LL GO SEE WHAT TOBI BROKE!**

 **Wolfy: *picks up baseball bat* OH NO YOU DON'T! WHO THE FUCK GAVE YOU THAT-!?  
**

 **Deidara: *sighs* I guess I'll just update this for her..**

* * *

The silverette was clearly unimpressed.

"Don't quote Finding Nemo!" Natasha scolded him, her body curled around Kisame to the point where her arms wrapped around his head and neck in a half-assed attempt to shield his hearing, "That could be found highly offensive! You should be asha-"

Ryuu had her pinned to the floor before she could finish, the moment after being filled with scrambling limbs to throw her back and away from the group, while his ankle dagger and belt pistol aimed defensively at the surrounding men.

"Back up! Back up!" He snapped, pushing Natasha's stunned protests back towards the door, "Stay the fuck away from my sister!"

"R-Ryuu!" Natasha finally shouted, "Don't go shooting up my fucking room! I just finished cleaning up the brat's war zone last week!" She ground her teeth when he only continued to eye the tense and silent men, swinging her arm forward and giving him a rough uppercut, being the angle, that sent him to his left. "I _**said**... Don't shoot up my room, **Ryuu**_..." The green haired boy only had a moment's peace before he was, quite literally, sat on, and pinned to the floor by the girl sitting in a cross-legged lock on his back.

"Nata-" he choked, only to have the weapons pried from his fingers and his face pressed into the floor. "Shut up," Natasha cut him off calmly, "If you can't handle your god-damned ecstasy, don't use the fucking shit.."

"Foo-Fink- I _Fugd Vou_ -*?!" She heard him scream into the cold marble, "Don be _Favicufas_ *-!"

"Why are you trying to shoot the air, then?!" She sang irritably, "Baka-Ryuu.." she sniffed slightly, turning to glance lovingly at the group, before turning back to the person under her. "Calm the fuck down.. I don't care if you're seeing Barney and he's singing Satan's hymns.." She pulled at his hair in warning, before adjusting to stand, "What I see, is a group of men that I hold dear to me.. This thing you slipped me will be wrapped, and placed in a gift box, then under my personal tree by Christmas eve... That gives you two entire months.."

"It's not drugs!" he had lifted his head, his squirming increasing ten-fold as he finally managed to throw her off and scramble back up, "I didn't drug you-! .. _This time.._ There's no way this is real-!"

She had already disappeared from his line of view, and he glanced around blankly, only to zero in on the purring form of his sister swinging her legs back and forth in front of the zealot of the criminal group. She was sitting "innocently" on the edge of her counter, smirking as the male's amethyst eyes roved up and down what she had demurely placed before him.

"Are you.." The greenette rasped, carefully, on the verge of passing out, "Trying to get sacrificed..?" The silver haired man had smirked at that, shifting half a step closer for a better view at the offer.

"What's it look like?" She called irritably, sending her brother a brief look of exasperation, "You know I support Jashin.. ..And don't act shocked, because this isn't real.." She rolled her eyes, before smoothly turning back to the leftover-Chinese-eating male. His chopsticks were held just before reaching his mouth as he pointedly ogled her, the chicken there threatening to fall and hit the shiny marble floor.

"So~" she smirked, reaching forward to trace her hand down his jaw, eyeing him suggestively, much to his glee, "What do you say we grab the knives and the needles and have a little-"

"OHFUCKNO-!"

Natasha felt herself falling to the side as her brother - _once again-_ tackled her to the floor, this time, actually having taken a swing at the zealot, and giving him a beautifully clean slash to display down a diagonal pattern across his chest. "Ryuu-what the fuck-?! You could have hit me-!" The silver haired male swore under his breath, glaring at the teen with irritation due to unnatural pain.

"Shut up!" The teen snapped, knocking his sister over the head and giving a fierce glare to the purple-eyed male, "Touch her, and I will make sure every day for the rest of your life you will question what gender you are you fucki-"

A foot slamming into his jaw sent him sprawled to his left, and he was barely able to stay upright as he found his sister -some two and a half minutes later- ripping open several packages of poptarts, and shredding the pieces, scattering them in front of each of the remaining felines.

She had abruptly stopped, diving for the small remote sitting on the coffee table and clicking the 'on' button, jumping on the couch a few seconds later, and starting to jump from cushion to cushion.

After the initial mini-melody of the 'on' startup on the stereo system, music began to pour from the speakers set up strategically around the room, blaring what he vaguely registered as the 'Fight Song' by Rachel Platten.

He felt his eyes grow heavier as he dragged himself into a more comfortable position against the chair, giving the suddenly focused felines a glare as they, one by one, bit into the treat, and disappeared, replaced with _much_ larger humans with color-coordinating hair colors.

Only when the lone kitten on the couch disappeared, revealing a _very naked_ , _very familiar_ woman with violet hair, did he-once again- lose consciousness.

* * *

Natasha continued to jump from cushion to cushion, spinning here and there with a shit-eating grin as she avoided the floor.

Konan frowned at her in concern, grasping her ankle as she made to pass, effectively having the teen crash into the couch, face-first, right next to her. With a look of surprise, she stiffened when, instead of running away from the criminals, she, quite the contrary, launched herself at the slowly-standing Pein, who had only a half second to wrap the flimsy blanket around his hips, before he had a mass gluing itself to his side. He merely stiffened, rather than throwing her off, and carefully looked down to meet her eyes. Wide, child-like golden orbs stared intently into his own pale violet ones, the sudden awe and raw emotion in them partially disarming.

Natasha held her breath for a few seconds, before snapping her gaze to the side. Her gaze locked onto two males, one with dark brown hair, the other with raven black, the brown-haired male having dived face-first into a pile of blankets and hidden himself with a cry of fear. The raven barely glanced him, before pulling one of the top blankets off and covering himself, tossing two more out to the man with stitches, and the man with two-toned skin.

"Fuck logic," She muttered under her breath, a dark look passing over her eyes as she shakily stepped back, earning the intrigued and guarded stares of the entire mass, "Fuck keeping shit clean.." Her hands quivered as she spun on her heal, marching over to her closet and wrenching the doors open. She shuffled around a few things, before pulling out a large blade, not a traditional katana, but more styled so it resembled a viking's conquest. With an aura of murderous passion, she marched over to the pile of blankets with a snarl.

"Oh no you don't-" was all she heard, before she was pulled backwards, an arm looped around her waist as the sword swung at an awkward arch, "No bloodshed, hmm.."

She tensed slightly, craning her neck back, smiling at the blonde bomber, "Deidara.. Please let me go kill Tobi.. I promise I'll be quick, then we can go set off my fireworks collection-!"

He looked partially surprised, but quickly covered it up, prying the sword from her fingers and having it clatter to the floor, walking her calmly over to the couch to sit, his hands on her shoulders, and his tone even, and calm, "And how do you know my name..?"

"Are you nuts?" Sh giggled, her hands clasping as she held them to her chest, "You're Iwa Deidara! Most suave bomber in all of history-! Your creations are legendary-! You're just above five and a three fourth's feet! You're birthday is May fifth! Your zodiac sign is a Taurus-! You're a hundred and twelve pounds-! By the way you need to eat more," her excitement paused to scold him, then reared back up again, the room's tense, curious onlookers silent, though Deidara seemed particularly stiff, staring at her with wide blue eyes, "You were part of the Explosion Corps Surprise Attack and Diversion Platoon, before you broke away to pursue your own passions, assisting rouge ninja in off chance of creating your art- That is until the Akatsuki approached you-! You were met with Sasori and Itachi, Itachi having used his Shiringan to trick you into losing a duel in order to join the ranks-!" she turned sympathetic at that, "I personally wanted to slap the back of his head for that.. Don't feel alone on that one.. And SASUKE-" Her tone turned venomous, "Killed you in his FUCKING SECOND FORM-" she started to shake, her hands curling into fists as she gripped the chair, "Son of a bitch- UGH HE DIDN'T EVEN GET THE WHOLE MOTHER FUCKING STORY-!" While she began to grumble about how much she wanted to pluck the feathers from his, and Konan quoted 'Duck-ass-hair', Pein took a deep breath, before walking up to her, standing in front of her firmly, a hand at his hip holding the blanket in place.

"Wolfe, Natasha."

She looked up at him, instantly silenced.

"You have cared for us in a.. vulnerable position.."

She blinked.

"And, we are thankful," he gave her a slight frown.

She blinked again.

"We are not in our homelands," he continued, slowing down slightly as she continued to stare in stoic silence, "..And.. we'd be highly thankful.. if.." he stopped, and leaned down slightly, peering at her, "Can you understand me, Wolfe?"

She blinked again.

He frowned, leaning closer when it appeared that all the life had been sucked from her body, "Miss Wolfe?"

She launched herself at him, and he was tackled to the floor, rolling on instinct to pin her, just as Sasori had done. She was glowing with awe up at him, her hands clasped to her chest as she grinned. "Best. Dream. _Ever.._ "

"First drugged, now asleep.." Kisame sighed, giving her a pitying look, "Does she have a hard time accepting reality..?"

His hand flew up, catching a stray pillow that had been lodged at his head.

"I WISH THAT WERE IT-!" Ryuu yelled, then lit up, like he had solved the world's biggest problem. "I have an idea.."

With a speed that most of the ninja were familiar with (aka Civilian's attempt at a sprint) the green haired boy waltzed up to Pein, peering down at his sister inncoently, "Natasha dearest.. We're out of Pocky.. And Shizuka threw all of our ramen into a bag and put it in mother dearest's closet."

The silverette tensed slightly, the awe snapping off like a switch, as her expression melted from jubilation to pure and unadultered fear.

"N-Nana..?"

* * *

*You think I _drugged_ _you_?!

*Don't be _ridiculous_ -!

 **Wolfy: *low whistle* Well, this was a bit late.. so sorry for that..**

 **Deidara: Computers are annoying, hmm..**

 **Wolfy: *pouts* Gomen, Deidara-kun.. I was trying to find out who hurt Ryuu-kun..**

 **Deidara: *Rolls his eyes* That would have been Konan, yeah.. She opened a door in his face on accident..**

 **Wolfy: So it wasn't Sasuke..? *subtly tosses bear traps out window, hitting a random cat* *covers her flinch* Sorry Mister Pines-!**

 **Sasori: *Sighs* Rate and Review please..**


	10. Could You Repeat That?

Natasha swallowed thinly as she sat, huddled in the corner of her couch, staring at her hands in wonder. She was tempted never to wash them again, but the cliche girls always annoyed her.. Fuck it. She was asking.

"And.. how did you become felines..?" She spoke up suddenly, the small, private conversation they were having in her bathroom pausing as they glanced back out at her, still half naked, except for Konan, who had gratefully accepted a soft yellow sundress she had in the recess of her closet. Said woman was sitting with her now, keeping an eye on the suddenly aware teen and the now conscious, but reserved, green haired male. Ryuu kept sneaking soft glances at her, his burning gold eyes memorizing every feature.

About ten minutes later, they had filed out of her bathroom of the gods, settling back around the lounge area calmly. She watched patiently as Pein stood before her, his eyes firm. "We have reached a decision about the situation."

She nodded, calm and silent as she rested her hand on her knee, sitting as she naturally did in company, poised and untouchable, "And that would be..?"

He looked vaguely surprised that she could be so polite, before nodding, sitting almost god-like into one of the white leather chairs. "We are otherwise indisposed here, as I had stated earlier, and will need a place to stay until further notice.."

A crack resonated in the room, and Ryuu sat, huddled in a ball, whining, "What the hell, Nata-?!"

"Stop perving, baka," She grunted, shaking out her wrist, "Eye-level.. Anything lower and I'm going to neuter you.." He tensed at that, his form suddenly behind Kisame. "But you would hurt Kisame.." he trailed off, her glare shutting him up. "Kisame is smart enough to move.. or hand you over..." She paused, then shook her head, "Nah.. he wouldn't hand you over.. probably step out of the way, though.."

"And how would you know what I would do..?" He smirked slightly, showing off his pointed teeth in what appeared to be a scare tactic. The only person appearing scared by the sight, though, was Ryuu, as his eyes were going wide and fearful.. "Hoshigaki-sama.. Don't smirk at her..." At the confused and curt look sent his way, he squeaked, turning to hide behind Itachi, "I am NOT gonna be flattened under-"

Natasha had gotten up and was standing in front of Kisame now, her left hand on her hip while her right cradled her chin.

"It doesn't do you an ounce of justice," she stated under breath, looking him up and down, before giving him her own toothy smirk, his surprised look making it widen, "Your pecs are awesome.. What do you bench?"

Ryuu shook his head slowly, before nudging the Uchiha with his elbow, a brief flash of warning in his eyes. He seemed to be communicating something while his sister began listing off the many things she knew about Kirigakure, including several lesser known platoon names and battle techniques that very few living souls even remembered..

Kisame's big blue hand closed over her mouth suddenly as she got into his platoon details, and she fell silent. a high squeak sound being the only thing she gave at the sudden silence. Ryuu inwardly groaned, bringing his hand up to cover his eyes. "I'm not watching this. I'm not watching this. If I ignore it, it will go away.."

He continued to repeat that for several tense seconds, until Natasha lifted her hand, settling it over Kisame's firmly. He let it drop, though she held tight, her fingers curling around his as she tugged his wrist forward, pulling herself into his torso and wrapping her arms tightly around his waist.

"-And she did it.." Ryuu muttered, not looking up as he turned his back to them, rubbing his temples.

Natasha looked up slightly her golden eyes filled with awe, while his beady black eyes stayed firm as he plainly stared back, "You, of all of the men in the world, are the most loyal that I have ever come to know.. You will forever be my idol and role model..."

He was quiet for a minute, his expression not softening, but calming. She felt his hand lift, before resting on her head, giving it an awkward pat-slash ruffle, before he stepped away, moving to go explore the kitchen.

"He didn't kill you, huh.." Ryuu breathed after a minute, the intense stares of the others giving him a slight chill, "Though, they might.."

"I think it's time you explained how you know so much about us," Sasori was the first to speak up, and she waved her hand dismissively towards him as she toyed with a box labelled 'Sleepovers Only, "Nah, I think we'll skip that little chat.." "It wasn't a request.." her eyes trailed up toward the deep voice of Itachi Uchiha, slightly curious that his eyes remained onyx. "No Shiringan.. huh?" at the narrowing of his eyes, she smirked a bit, nodding, "Yeah.. I can deal with this now.." "And you couldn't, before..?" Ryuu called exasperatedly nearly pulling out his hair from the roots as he tugged at the strands, clearly uncomfortable and agitated, "I'm starting to really.. really Natasha, I can't.."

"Curb Check," she muttered, watching as he turned to bolt for the door, only to run into Kakuzu. He had stumbled back slightly, falling to his rear as he scoot back and away from him, nearly crab walking to the center of the floor, his face stoney but his eyes burning bright with adrenaline and fear.

"Gravity's working," Natasha shrugged, tossing the package of shiny foil into the air, watching as it hit the back of his head. He sent a quick, sharp look to her, so she pretended not to notice, moving to dig, and finally find, the pristine package of paper. The slid open the flap at the end, pulling out a brushed red laptop. At the sight, Ryuu's attention was on her, eyes narrowed, "Why the hell do you have an electronic I know nothing about..?" "I also have two more Facebook accounts, but I don't see you friending the first one," she shot back coolly, her face blanking a his slight flinch. "Fair enough," he agreed under his breath lightly, slowly glancing up and to his right, his golden eyes locking with a pair of amber ones, his own blinking slowly as he relaxed against the rug.

"Will you stop staring at her, already," Natasha muttered beneath her breath, pressing her hand on top of his head as she passed him, moving to sit on the corner of her bed. His hand had shot up to swat hers, before he grumbled, his face and neck flushing when the purple haired women had tilted her head toward him. He looked away, moving to sit cross legged at the end of one of her couches, preventing anyone from sitting near or too close to him. "Natasha... Mind telling me how you plan on passing the-"

"Firewall down," she didn't let him finish, his silence enough as she felt someone lean forward from behind her, making a sharp chill go up her spine as she typed at the keyboard using three fingers on each hand. She swallowed back the indignant hiss of personal space as she soared through her private emails, finally turning back when she sent out six SOS messages and a re-peat of her earlier message to a friend in Michigan. "Do you mind..?"

Deidara raised his eyebrows as he inspected the device, his oceanic blue eyes peering at every possible crevice he could from that angle. "And what is that..?" "It is a super computer that has the ability to make the world explode," she narrowed her eyes at him calmly, and his honey-blonde eyebrows furrowed. "Mind telling ME," she turned towards Pein as he strode forward, all lean dominance, and low-hanging towel on his hips with his fierce lavender eyes- "Knock it off, ya perv-!" She trembled, her hands instantly over her mouth as she leaned back, "Jashin almighty, I said that out loud- I am so sorry-" her hands shook as she leaned back further, away from the men as they eyed her incredulously, her eyes unguarded and briefly terrified. Ryuu broke the silent spell, bursting out laughing as he threw his head back, his whole body shaking with mirth as he leaned against the arm of the sofa, "Oh shit-! She got you-!" "It's not funny-!" Natasha called back, nearly whining as she lifted her hands to cover her ears, "She started putting things in my head again that I did NOT NEED-" "And who is she..?" Pein asked sternly, watching the girl before him tense, her mouth curving in distaste as she swallowed, leaning back away from his as he answered, "How up to date are you guys on Schizophrenic treatment..? Nothing against Zetsu-!" she added quickly, holding up her hands in defense as she shot her eyes around the room, finally locking on the dark shadow behind her thick curtains, "I have total sympathy for the varying insights, be glad you do not have joined wills.. That would be hell..." "And not the fun kind.." Ryuu finished, gradually dying down from his laughing fit as he clutched his stomach, eyes bright, "So what did little miss Pervo say this time-"

"That if you called her little again, she'd make _you_ little.." Natasha grumbled, glaring at him, "My life is hard enough without you pissing her off.. I deal with the repercussion of her incident at school every day, I do _not_ need anything else from you.."

"Aww Shaddap," Ryuu rolled his eyes, "You know I love you.." "Not nearly enough," she muttered under her breath, glaring at the screen as she clicked away at a new document. "If you _truly_ loved me.." "I'm not doing that-!"

"Get rid of the cunt-" she started to hiss and he tensed, lifting a pillow to throw it at her when she crouched down, as if in defense, "One more move... And I delete it _all.._ " "I don't know what 'delete' means, but it does not sound good.." Kisame mumbled slightly, giving a sideways glance to his alive-again partner, who, in turn, glanced back with a subtle shake of his head. Ryuu shuddered, then narrowed his eyes, "You wouldn't dare.."

"Ryuu's Tumblr of the wonderfully-" "HOLY SHIT- STOP-!" He nearly screamed, leaning back and falling over the arm as he covered his ears, "I surrender-! I swear-! Just don't go any further-!" "On your knees again..?" Natasha snickered, seeing him tense and shudder at the mental image, "Digital Art is amazing-"

"Please don't..." He whimpered, and she sighed, shaking her head as she continued to type.. If he had half a brain at all, he'd notice she hadn't touched her mouse to switch windows in the first place.. "Geez, Romeo.. Take a chill pill.."

"What- is going on-!" Pein finally barked, and she'd lie if she said she wasn't a little bit scared.

"Tumblr is a digital weapon of mass fun and mass torture.." She explained slowly, "I have my own.. while his is... uhh... More up to date on his personal interests.."

"So, what exactly is it..?" Deidara questioned, now sitting beside her and bent to see the screen better, as far as he could tell, she was still writing notes, ones, he took notice, were of about statements of the current situation.

"A.. shipping thing..." she replied, non commitably, tilting her head to face him, "If you have a problem with... You know what, nevermind.." She shook her head quickly, before she turned back to the screen, pointing toward Pein with a frown, "You can't stay at this house.. I have siblings and a mother who has absolutely no objection to donating people like you lot to science.." "And where do you suggest we go, then?" his tone didnt sound like a question at all, but she pretended not to notice, "With me, of course."

"What-?" Ryuu cut in, dejectedly, "So we're suddenly criminal hoarders or whatever?" "So help me," she started to hiss, then swallowed, calming her face as she shot him a pointed look, "Do me a favor, nee-chan..?" His 'oh-fuck-' face didn't even make her falter, "They need clothes, and the only upsets from your closet would be with Kisame, and Kakuzu." He hummed slightly, pretending to think about it before he nodded, "Alright.. but.."

"No."

He grimaced, dragging his feet as he moved toward the door, " _Fiiinnneeeee..._ "

When her door had shut behind him, she sighed, lifting her hands for attention as she sat straight up, "Alright, I'm going to say a few things, first off, and hope not to be interrupted."

"I am certifiably insane." She waited for a moment for it to sink in, before she nodded at their level gazes, and continued, "I am also very spontaneous, and will have mood swings ranging from tear-your-throat-out to i-need-to-be-held. The latter is rare, so don't expect a mushy gushy brat." She stated so with a bored face as she leaned against her headboard, "I am in awe of you being here, and I look forward to learning about you, more, but I would also like to point out, if you have not already noticed, that you are no longer in your own world.."

She brushed her hair away from her face as she took a deep breath, "Many people know about you.. or a large majority, or minority," she supposed gently, "But a lot. You are not a secret organization, but your existence, in a sense, is ignored by the common face of society." "So like normal," Deidara cut in, and her brief look sent him silent once more.

"I have friends in another state- You are in America, that is the nation, of the continent, North America. America has fifty states, two of which are not connected to the actual land that is the nation, and each state has a capitol, and its own general laws. Laws from each state range, though you have luckily, or unluckily, landed yourself in one of the most lenient of places. You are in the state California, but the City, or village, as you may call it, Los Angeles. Also known as Hollywood, or the top film industry in the nation and in some cases, the world.

"Any questions?"

* * *

 **Wolfy: *wipes imaginary sweat from her forehead That should do it..**

 **Ryuu: *glares at his computer* It looks like crap..**

 **Wolfy: TT~TT Writer's block, Man-! Give me some leeway-!**

 **Ryuu: *mocks her whining with his hand* You know you haven't gotten any reviews for an entire three months..**

 **Wolfy: TT^TT**

 **Ryuu: *Rolls his eyes* Ugh.. You're hopeless, you know that..?**

 **Konan: I think she's doing just fine..**

 **Ryuu: You see, that is exactly the kind of coddling she _doesn't need._ We need to push her to do better**

 **Wolfy: You're acting like I'm your kid.**

 **Konan: *pets Wolfy's head* Sweety, Mommy's trying to talk to Ryuu. Can you go play with Tobi?**

 **Wolfy: Whaaaaat-? Buts he's evil-!**

 **Pein: *walks in* *grabs Wolfy's cloak collar* *drags her out without a word***

 **Ryuu:... Aah.. I'm in trouble, aren't I..?**

 **Konan: Oh-ho.. Big time..**


	11. Meeting in the Middle

**Wolfy: So- we shall begin with our routine antics.**

 **Topic of the day is… *spins giant wheel Ryuu borrowed from 'Price is Right'* ..Ta-ta-ta.. Landscaping-!… W-What are we supposed to do with this..?**

 **Ryuu: You're supposed to share short, stupid stories, baka.. Spin again..**

 **Wolfy: ..Fine.. *nudges it down* Siblings-! Now here's something to discuss-! Amber-chan, what about you? Any siblings and/or familial ties to friends?**

 **Ryuu: For instance, I'm in a family of technically seven, if not eight. Not everyone full blooded though.**

 **Amber- I have a family of four. Me being the second oldest. Middle child and whatnot *looks at the wheel wondering when did it show up there* What about you Wolfy-sama?**

 **Wolfy- I have one older sibling that's half blood, that I have met on my birth father's side, three half blood younger siblings on my mother's side, and I'll lost count of how many kids my biological father has had. I treat my friends' as family though, since the whole.. issues deal..**

 **Ryuu- Jeez, your life is depressing.**

 **Wolfy- *growls at him***

 **Amber- well, hey on my biological fathers side I know I have half siblings though I never met them since he left me and my bro +my mum+ when I was 3 months old. Had another woman preggo when he kicked us out. So, that is somewhat depressing?**

 **Wolfy- It's alright, Amber-chan. Ryuu's got a stick up his ass about teasing me.**

 **Ryuu- Hey-!**

 **Amber- a stick up his..ass…? Isn't that painful Ryuu? You know...for whenever you have to go potty?**

 **Wolfy-*smothers a laugh with her pillow***

 **Ryuu-*eye twitch* Did you corrupt this one, too? *jerks his thumb at Amber***

 **Amber- Hey! Okami-sama no corrupt meh! I corrupt myself thank you very much *puffs out chest***

 **Wolfy- *gasp* I second that-! Why do you always assume that I'm the one who breaks people-?!**

 **Amber- Ryuu...are sad that Okami-sama is not paying much attention to you...da awe~ Poor baby dragon *baby talks***

 **Ryuu- *eye twitches* I.. I have no words...**

 **Amber - *grins* I knew it! Okami-sama has a sour worshiper!**

 **Wolfy- *looks over, curious* Sour worshiper..?**

 **Amber - yush! Every kami has one!**

 **Wolfy- *looks over to Ryuu* Although I am not a god, is this true..**

 **Ryuu- *throws his hands up in the air, walking away* Alright. I'm done. Call me back when it's the epilogues.**

 **Amber - *pounces* NU you can't leave yet!**

 **Wolfy- *laughs, opening her laptop* Alright- Alright-! We've bored the audience enough-! Time to upload the chapter-!**

 **Amber - upload ze chappie?**

 **Wolfy- *nods***

 **Amber- zekay**

 **Ryuu- *still pinned* Amber.. Please get off of me….**

 **Amber -huh? Hmmmmmmmmmmm …..hmmmmm...mmmmm nah I'm pretty comfortable...**

 **Wolfy- Rate and review *flashes a peace sign***

 **Amber- *kitty grins while purring* Enjoy the show ~ *still pinning Ryuu***

* * *

"I have a question," Sasori was quick to pounce, his tone sharp and firm as he straightened from his relaxed leaning position against her wall. "This place, this world, you said few people know of us, but you treat us as if you know _everything_.." "She knows _most_ everything.." Ryuu butt in before she could open her mouth, "You'll never meet a more practiced stalker.."

A pillow smacked his face, and he was jolted to the side, his hands fisting into the fluffy white pillow and retching it from his face with a grumble. "Call me a stalker again, and i'll make you pay.." she muttered darkly, her eyes narrowed on him as he met her look, then looked away, pretending to be indignant as he masked his shudder with a snort. "So I love the Jinchiruki show, sue me." "Show," Itachi questioned lowly, "So, our lives prove amusement to your world." "Your deaths broke my heart," she narrowed her eyes toward his accusation, "You have no idea how many others cry every time they watch it.. Remember, its fiction here, so even if you think and know that its true, people still wont believe it truly, even _if_ what they feel for your characters is there.."

"Like Konan, for example" Ryuu inserted softly, "There are thousands of men, and women, in this world who worship the origami angel.."

"Or Konoha's elite," Natasha turned to Itachi sharply, then to Kisame, "Or one of the Great Seven Swordsmen.." She glanced toward Hidan, "Or a Jashanist, loyal to his God until his lack of existence.." She couldn't particularly say _'death' could she..?_ "Or a psychologically challenged cannibal," she trailed her eyes toward the curtains, before they fell upon Deidara, "Or an oppressed artist..

"A demi-god, obsessed with peace," she glared at Pein's equally intimidating look briefly, and glanced toward Sasori, "A heartless Doll.. Who only learned that he could care for something in his last moments.." She frowned toward Tobi, irritably, "I don't like you, so I'm not delving into that.." "Ouch," Ryuu chuckled, "The best for last was _denied_.."

"How is Tobi the best?" Deidara grimaced, and Ryuu's glee turned to fearful surprise, "How clueless are you at this point..? Really.."

"Clueless about what?" Hidan asked slowly, his eyes narrowing toward the two, then snapping toward the youngest female as her laptop chimed.

"Got a reply-!" She cut in quickly, leaning over the screen so Deidara couldn't 'eavesdrop'. God she hated it when people read over her shoulder..

"Who'd you even ask for help here..?" Ryuu asked quickly, covering their fault when he felt a wave of malice brush beside him as Tobi, ever so cheerful, settled onto the fluffy fur rug. "Just the girls.." she trailed off slowly, then flinched at his glare. His eyes, mirrors to her own, narrowed further, "Last I checked, they moved out of L.A... What the hell are you planning..?"

"Konan," she asked instead, her tone brighter as she read over the message, then closed it, bringing the firewalls back up before she shut the device, moving to side step Pein and maneuver around the various males as she made her way to her closet, "I'm going into the _literal_ war zone.."

"Dad's office..?" Ryuu repeated dumbly, running his hand down his face as he groaned, "You have that man wrapped around your finger..." _Smack-!_

" _Damnit Natasha-!"_ he nearly roared, rubbing the back of his head as he glared to the boot that had been lodged at him, now lying innocently on the floor behind him, "That hurt-!"

"Then stop patronizing me-!" she snapped back, growling softly when he took a step toward the closet. His step faltered, and he clenched his fists, taking a big, deep breath, before he turned to go into the bathroom. The group of older males watched in stunned silence until the females left the closet, the younger tying a stiff black neck tie around her collar and running a hand down the slight crinkles in the brown pencil blouse was a navy color, and a tepee jacket was thrown over her arm. "Alright.. I'll talk to father about switching schools up to Michigan, and you can hold the fort down here if you find any other.." Her eyes trailed toward Ryuu as he wiped his face with a cold, damp towel, "..strays.."

"So you want me to just wait around her while you go halfway across the country..?" He repeated, and she held up her hand, imitating a parrot as she shook her head, "No silly.. You're to stay here and _not wait up_ for us, while I integrate these criminals into a society less _lethal.._ They'll wind up dead here, and you know it.." "Not my fault we found 'em on a drug bust.." He grumbled, scoffing at her sharp look, instantly schooling his expression into bright and cheery, "Don't worry, I'll stay-" "When the hell did you plan to tell me about this..?" She had stalked forward towards him, his feet allowing him to stride backwards in a graceful sweep with each of her three steps forward. His hands were held up in surrender, or a general calming motion, but the others in the room merely watched in silent observation. "Now Nata.. You know the gang does gritty work every once in a while.."

"And you said you had a desk job," she hissed. He flinched, but when his back hit the door, his tense shoulders became stiff, "Natasha, seriously, you need to calm down.." "Lying, no-good, son of an-Uchiha-loving!" She started to roar, at this point in his face (or below it) and poking his chest sharply with each word, until she paused, her shoulder jumping in the strain as she took a sharp step back, running a hand through her single braid to check for flyaway before she sent a quick, brief bow toward the general area of the criminals, "Apologies, Uchiha-sama...s..." she stated, slurring a soft 's' at the end of her sentence and masking it with a slight cough. She waved slightly in farewell, before turning toward the door, grasping the handles as she spoke once more. "I'll be back in abut an hour at most. You have my word."

"And if your word is worthless?" Kakuzu spoke up, really for the first time, and she turned toward the rough timber with a soft smile, "Then I'll put it on my mother's life. How about that?" "Deal," Pein nodded slightly, and she returned the gesture, swinging open the doors and sighing softly as the lock clicked into place behind her. She strode down the hallway smoothly, passing only one maid who was busy dusting a shelf of vases and figurines of glass.

* * *

"Michigan.." The low voice nearly echoed around the sparsely furnished study, old-English drapery and design reaching its peak to make it official looking and to give off an 'in-charge' aura.

"Yes." Her voice was quiet, but firm.

"You want.. to transfer to Michigan.." His jaw was loose, clenching and unclenching with thought, a move she had seen him do often in the heat of meetings and discussions.

"Yes, father." She nodded slowly, "I really, want to go.."

"And," he leaned forward at his study desk, the room dim save for the monitor of his computer and the glow of the old-time styled desk lamp, "What, pray tell, is so wrong with Shore-view Highschool..?" She had prepared for this question down the entire stretch of the mansion, and for most of her highschool years, actually, ever since she had had the 'incident' several years prior.. _No.. Focus.._

"My grades have been fine," she started slowly, her hands cupping a single knee, one leg over the other as she sat pin-straight in the guest recliner, her father's blazing golden orbs locked with her own, jewel shaped ones, "And I've had no issues with the schooling system.. It's just.." _Just say it.._ "The environment around me.. is.." she felt the words catch in her throat, and she felt panic clouding her thoughts. She was blowing it, she was supposed to be keeping the others safe, getting them out of the firing zone and-

"Fine."

"W-What..?" she felt her muscles freeze in place, her eyes blinking slowly as she focused on his face. He was serious.

His jaw was sculpted and set, his eyes narrowed in both concentration, with his head tilted in recognition. It was often the face that he gave to Ryuu when he made a good grade, not so much pleased or proud, more so on the edge of acceptance and tolerance. "I said you can go. Is that a surprise.." "I'm.. wondering where the catch is.." she managed after a few moments, tucking her head in just so when he gave a soft, relieved sigh, he had taught her well.

"You remember Mr. Kotetsu?" he started calmly, his tone probing and expectant. Fortunately, she was up-to-date on her father's business affairs. One had to be, when in their family, that or face the cold shoulder during dinner when discussing company affairs. "CEO of the Hollywood Palms Talent Agency," she inclined her head toward his pleased look, "You last dined with him to discuss merging the company assets for his latest film investment, among other things." "Correct," he gestured toward his expensive, but hardly-used laptop, the screen currently off, "And among those other things, we had toyed with the idea of placing his sons as interns in my company, as well as putting light to my own family in his." "I'm not following," she admit after a moment of silence, "Did you sign me up for a talent audition without my knowledge.?"

"Yes and no," he was careful to lean back, exuding ease and comfort in the simple motion. It really was obvious why he was head of the company, he wasn't so much a tech wiz as he was a wizard with people - he could make the most spiteful executive bashful towards his charm. "The film that Kotetsu-kun had invested in creating was actually based in Michigan.. Which," he admit calmly, "is why I was surprised to know you wish to go go there." "Cut to the grit, please?" she questioned cooly after a tense minute, he didn't fool her for a second, "What is it you want me to do?" "Audition for Night Song," he took on his bargaining pose, leaning forward to rest his elbows on the desk, his palm lying flat across the protective mat, "You just have to try- actually try," he repeated the latter upon her dubious look, "Pretend to _want_ to be there, at the least.."

"What do I get from this?" she took a similar pose, her eyes narrowing as she folded one leg over the other, drumming her finger nails along the crease of her elbow quietly. "What do you want?" he offered casually. She wasn't stupid, "What are you offering?"

He sighed, a faint smile on his lips as he nodded in acknowledgement, "You'll phone once a day-" "Twice a week," she countered smoothly. When he had opened his mouth to counter the arrangement, she pinned him with a look of absolute certainty.

"..Fine.. Twice a week.."

"What else?" she prodded cooly. "For starters you'll have an escort." "For what?" her pride was forefront now, and he realized, too late, that he had jabbed at it. "NOt for protection- for publicity.. I can't just let you loose into the country. Not only is it irresponsible, but what kind of father would I be..?" It took her a few minutes to think it over, the older male, respecting her contemplation by remaining silent. Finally she gave a low sigh, nodding her head as she looked toward the curtained window, "Will I get to choose who it is..?" "Of course," he nodded firmly.

"Anyone I want.." she repeated slowly, giving a tiny, thoughtful frown toward his nod, "I'll.. Ask Ashe, then.."

And he gave a sigh of relief so true, he would feel nearly weightless as he leaned back in his desk chair.

"Thank-you.."

* * *

 **Sasori: So you finally decided to update?  
**

 **Wolfy: Yeah, took a while to figure out where to leave off...**

 **Deidara: *cough* _procrastinator_ *cough***

 **Wolfy: *sticks her tongue out at him***

 **Sasori: He's right you know, you need to be more consistent.**

 **Wolfy: *grumbles* geez, ill work on it..**

 **Deidara: The pol is still up-! For those of you who are clueless-!**

 **Sasori: Deciding who Natasha-chan should end up with.**

 **Deidara: *holding old-style microphone* In the lead we have a four-way tie between Itachi- Kisame- Kakuzu and Sasori- with Pein and Hidan just on their coattails.. Wait a minute, nobody wants me..?!  
**

 **Sasori: *smirks* tough luck, brat.. they want what they want..**

 **Deidara: *sulks in the emo corner* ...**

 **Wolfy: Nobody's even really doing the poll, Dei-dei.. If more people voted wed have a better idea about whats going to happen..**

 **Sasori: Shouldn't you already know?**

 **Wolfy: *sweatdrops* Uhhh... *bolts for the window* WOLFY-OUT-!**


	12. Pack Away My Troubles

**Wolfy:** **So the poll results show that Kisame is in the lead, therefore, I decided to invite him here as tnight's guest of honor.**

 **Ryuu: Guest of honor? You mean victim of sacrifice?**

 **Wolfy: *slaps strip of ductape over his mouth* Moving on.. Give it up for Hoshigaki, Kisame everybody-!**

 ***audience applauds enthusiastically***

 **Ryuu:** ** _Mmmph mm mmae mmmeh mrrr?!_**

 **Kisame: *walks up to Wolfy, pats her head, then sits down* Sup squirt?**

 **Wolfy: *giggles quietly* So, Hoshigaki- or can I call you Kisame..?**

 **Kisame: *shrugs, grinning* Anything works.**

 **Wolfy: So, Kisame- *smother a giggle with her sleeve, hiding it with a cough* The poll results are in so far, and you're taking it by storm. What are your thought on this?**

 **Kisame: *smiles widely* What can I say? They have good taste..**

 **Wolfy: *under her breath, wide eyed* No kidding.. owo...**

 **Ryuu: *rips tape off of his mouth* *glares at Wolfy* Do not** ** _ever_** **do that again.. *sees her sparkly eyes* -_-" .. Good god, Hoshigaki.. Where's your shirt..?!  
**

 **Kisame: *chuckles***

 **Wolfy: *clears her throat* A-** ** _hem_** **.. N-Next question.. What are your feelings toward Natasha-hime, thus far..?**

 **Kisame: *scratches his chin* Well.. She was very.. maturnal, in the begining, when she had to- *clears his throat* tend to us..**

 **Ryuu: *sighs, bored* And as of late..?**

 **Kisame: *starts to snicker* She's a lot more fun when she's out of her mind than she is "sober" *airquotes*..**

 **Ryuu: *narrows his eyes, opens his mouth***

 **Wolfy: *puts her hand over Ryuu's mouth* What would you say to a romantic involvement with the aforementioned female, mm?**

 **Kisame: *starts to turn purple* Aah.. I guess it would be, an expirience...?**

 **Ryuu: *eyes glint* *tears Wolfy's hand off* Expirience-?! You're calling my sister an expirience-?!**

 **Wolfy:** ** _WOAH RYUU- PUT THE COUCH DOW-_**

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 **Deidara: We regret to inform you we are having some technical difficlties, which will for sure be resolved by the end of the chapter, thank you..**

 **Sasori: Why are you still reading this? Go read the chapter. *waves you toward the page break* Shoo before I call Kakuzu..**

 **Deidara: *stage whispers* He means the head of security...**

* * *

"So, what's the sitch"," Ryuu called curiously, watching his sister's mouth mutter a string of words along the lines of ' _don't quote Kim Possible'_ before she fully turned to face him, her eyes shooting wide a millisecond later, darting around the room in search of other men, before zeroing in on his hands, currently giving Gerard and Majesty the back-rub of a lifetime. "Why are they..?" "Back to normal," he offered. At her hesitant nod, her rolled his shoulder in a shrug, pausing the ministrations to the tiger-kitten and earning a grumbled hiss, towards which he quickly resumed his former actions, "Dunno.. I think the "Poptart Powers" wore off.. I didn't want to make them human again on my own, so.."

"Hidan scratch you?" she raised an eyebrow, and he shuddered, shaking his head. With a sigh, she released her hair from the pins, letting them clatter back onto her vanity with tiny clicks. "I need to start packing.." "He agreed," Ryuu muttered, almost curious as to how she pulled such a feat off. Then again, it didn't really matter. "When do we set out?"

"Idrive out next week," she waved back calmly, setting out to spread onto her bed, moving aside Marshmallow and Viper from her pillows as she reached for the 'land line'. Her eyes slipped around the room, counting off the fur covered faces with a satisfied nod before the other end picked up.

" _Gardener's office, Michael Watson speaking_."

"Cut the crap, Mike," she smiled slightly, hearing his the head of security detail sigh in a relieved manner. " _Aah, it's just you.."_

"My dad scares you that much?" she raised an eyebrow at his barely-there chuckle, " _Something like that.."_

" _What do you need..?_ "

"Where's Ashe working tonight?" she cut right to the chase, hearing what sounded like a creaky chair and lots of papers being shuffled before he gave an answer, " _Do you want his assignment or am I rescheduling him?_ " "Book him a few hours off at two," she glanced down when she felt a tug at her shirt, blinking gently at the sight of Marshmallow batting at the loose end of her belt, as if it were a feather toy, "Make sure he gets the memo to meet me out front.." She managed to finish after only a half beat,placing the receiver into the cradle after a 'Yes, Ma'am' from him and a 'thank-you' from herself. She felt a nudge at her foot as she rolled her shoulders, looking down with a start to see Ichigo. He looked at her pointedly, and she held up her hands in casual defeat.

"Sorry to break it to you, but you're staying like that for a while.." His eyes widened at her statement, so she quickly continued, "Not only am I out of Poptarts, but I would prefer it if you had clothes to put on upon changing.." When he gave a low, grumbled hiss, she pulled her ace, "You lasted almost an entire month as a cat, what's two more days going to do?"

"... _Muff._.."

* * *

"I owe you, big-time," she clapped the much taller, leanly muscled male on the small of his back, since she would have to be on her tippy-toes to get his shoulder blades. He glanced down with a brief nod, but otherwise kept his burgundy eyes trained forward and around them in the crowded mall. "Remind Michael when we get back," she continued at his normal platitude, "-about your deployment.." She smiled brightly to him, her brother behind her and watching the display in stunned, dumbfound resignation. "So he's going, too? And I still can't.."

"It would be too suspicious," Natasha repeated for the fifth time in thirteen minutes and- forty-two seconds. "Just go get the sizes we need, I will not deal with this morning's issues again.." "Aye-Aye, Okami-sama," he drawled, giving a mock salute as he wandered toward Abercrombie and Finch.

" _AND NO PINK-!"_

She could imagine his indignant groan of annoyance as she dragged Ashe toward Hot Topic by the crook of his arm.

* * *

" _So you're really coming?_ " the feminine voice filtered through the speakers of her phone, currently on hands-off mode so she could correctly pack away her closet.

"Yes Mira, I'm really coming." Natasha rolled her eyes to the ceiling, a small smile on her lips as she searched further for a missing stiletto.. Now where did she last see it..? Maybe by the scarves..?

" _And you're transferring to my school for the rest of the year? Next year, too?_ " Disbelief, was all Natasha could pull from the tone as she burrowed beneath a mountain of fallen silks and pumps. _Damn that freaking five inch blue heel.._ "Unless you switched from Lake Front to Beach Way, yes I will be going to your school.." Her head popped up from the top of the pile as she chucked a blue heel, but the wrong style, out of it, hearing it smack into a post of her bed and clatter to the floor. "God damnit, you freaking ghost, where the hell did I put that shoe-?"

" _This is surreal,_ " the female on the other line cheered, ignoring the obvious irritation in the silverette's outburst." _I'll finally have a Fire boy and Water-girl partner who wont wimp out on me-!"_

"It's also taxing," Natasha added with a huff, flopping onto her back as she glared up at the ceiling, "My hands hurt and I'm ready to pass out.."

" _Reowr.. Hssssss-!"_ "Marshmallow-!" Natasha called out irritably, "So help me- if you and Gerard don't behave on this trip-!" "

 _"Are you yelling at something?"_ The girl called through curiously, the squeak of a swivel chair leaning back echoed through the speaker with her concern. _  
_

"Sorry, Mira," Natasha quickly sat up, grabbing her phone from its delicate set-up against a shoebox and bringing it closer to her throat, "y cat's are attempting to immitate donkeys.." " _How many cats do you have..?_ " Mire asked slowly, and the silverette could almost feel how the girl's eyebrows had furrowed accusingly. She knew she wasn't one to have pets.. Her father's wife was.. *shudder* .. "About that.." Natasha began, cutting off when candelabra rolled off of the counter, clattering to the floor like a gong. "Faah- Hikaru-?!"

 _"You did_ not _just go Ouran on me.."_ "No-! I just- Gah-!" Natasha growled, standing up to march over towards the big scuffle, pulling Marshmallow off of Gerard in the process before setting her phone down on the counter, "Hang on, Mira.." She grasped Hikaru b his scruff as he attempted to slip out from beneath her bar stools, bulling both him and Marshmallow up to eye level, her glare cold and piercing, "You two have five seconds to chill out before I tell Ryuu to go and buy separate time-out kennels.." Abruptly, they wilted, and she flinched when they turned kitten-eyes on her, each giving a soft 'but-we're-cute' mewls.

"Manipulative bastards," she grumbled, setting them down onto a cushion of her couch with a final, "Behave-!" before she stood back up, moving to grab her still in-call phone. "Mira- still there..?" " _Uh-huh.._ " She almost sensed her rolling her eyes, " _Some cats you got.._ " She decided to change the subject, quickly, before she spilled everything and likely got herself into a deeper mess over the phone..

"So," she went back towards the half-packed closet, "I pay half rent, and the water, you get the electric, and we take turns buying food?" " _I pay the internet and you get personal essentials,_ " Mira agreed calmly, " _That should cover the bases.._ " "I'm going to email you the student files I need added to the system," Natasha rolled her shoulders, tossing Majesty, who had found a seat atop her current suitcase, a look of slight annoyance, but mostly amusement, "One second, Mi-mi," she held the shone to her chest tightly, bending down so she was eye-to-eye with the washed denim blue colored feline, "You gotta move, buster, I'm packing this junk up.." She held the phone back out as he mewled, hopping off of the case, but sitting his but directly over a scarf at the base of it on the floor, giving her a look she could only guess that meant he was smirking.

"Back.." " _Anything else..?_ " Mira intoned, and she gave a slight groan, her comrade halfway across the country leaning forward in her chair when she heard the discomfort. "Yeah.. I'll need about ten birth certificates, social security cards, immunization cards and fake records.." " _For..?_ " "Let's just say," Natasha glanced toward the couch, where five of the nine- (Ryuu had taken Sasori to his room to show off his puppet collection.. *shudder*) -had taken it upon themselves to call their -bed-. "I probably bit off more than I can chew.." " _We all do at least once in our lives.._ " "Can I count on you..?" she asked, almost pathetically, in her opinion.

The girl on the other end of the line smiled slyly, spinning around in her leather, black swivel chair to face away from the wall of glowing monitors behind her, illuminating her hair to turn darkened blue and her pale skin to light up brightly.

" _What else are friends for..?_ "

* * *

 **Ryuu: *shudders* What is it with you and creepy cut offs..?**

 **Wolfy: *glares* What is it with you and temperamental fighting?**

 **Ryuu: *slides his sprained wrist brace under the desk* Psshh...**

 **Konan: *forces his wrist back out to drop ice on it***

 **Ryuu: _Ack-! Woman-!_ You're trying to kill me-!**

 **Konan: *rolls her eyes* Save Kisame the trouble next time.. *mumbles***

 **Ryuu: Heyy..**

 **Wolfy: *pouts* I want to have talk-show sessions more often..**

 **Ryuu: *tick-mark* He came out without a FUCKING SHIRT-!**

 **Konan: *presses the ice down harder, ignoring Ryuu's yelp* Alright, enough. Wolfy, time to sign off..**

 **Wolfy: *nods quickly* Hai, Ko-chan..**

 **Ryuu: *whimpers in pain***

 **Wolfy: *grins at the camera* Sayonara-! Review and Vote for who Natasha-Hime should _love~_**

 **Ryuu: *sits up straight, glaring at the camera* So help me if anyone picks that no good T-  
**

 **Konan: *covers his mouth* Thank you for watching. Have a wonderful life. Bye.**

.


End file.
